I have the house to myself for another 6 days

2008-07-28 02:03:42

#1

GodFather: Blademaster's bottom bitch; +387|6677|Phoenix, AZ

So, my parents are in California, time share shit, they took a vacation basically in Napa Valley, and I have no siblings, the dog is with my step moms brother, and i have the house to myself for another 6 days...

So I ask of you BF2s, what should I do?

I already built a fort with my friend, because were awesome like that.

https://img133.imageshack.us/img133/9125/fortloveas0.jpg

Spoiler (highlight to read):
And we have a few girlies coming over, one is REALLY fucking hot and sweats my friends nuts (wants him) and he will probably get some in the fort.

So any ideas?
Also, "how not to fuck this up" ideas are welcome too, such as dont burn candles so you dont burn the house down or w.e

karmaz will be awarded to solid ideas

2008-07-28 02:10:00

#2

DonFck: Hibernator; +3,227|7089|Finland

No offense, but you might want to "demolish" and hide all evidence of your fort there, if you plan to have any success with the aforementioned girls.

I don't think they'll be that "turned on" by a fort. Although, you can always try. Maybe they'll think it's cute.

That's a big maybe.

I need around tree fiddy.

2008-07-28 02:10:03

#3

.Sup: be nice; +2,646|6911|The Twilight Zone

Isn't it obvious? First thing you do is invite some hawt girls. Then you buy some booze and then... you go play BF2 and the girls go out working on the field. haha lol

https://www.shrani.si/f/3H/7h/45GTw71U/untitled-1.png

2008-07-28 02:10:35

#4

Defiance: Member; +438|7128

You'll fuck everything up if you put another image on imageshack.

www.tinypic.com

And you know... I guess if forts are her thing... might work out... although, if I'm reading this right, "Fort Love" will go over bad in a good way or just plain really bad.

2008-07-28 02:16:44

#5

GodFather: Blademaster's bottom bitch; +387|6677|Phoenix, AZ

well the fort was done simply for the lulz, and my friend was like, "We were going to call it fort rape... but..." and she was like, "well its not rape if I want to "

Theyre cool girls and its just a joke, weve chilled with them plenty of times before and they know were not losers that actually build forts because we think its cool

so stop busting my balls on the fort

2008-07-28 02:17:35

#6

LividBovine: The Year of the Cow!; +175|6837|MN

Dude, candles are romantic. Girls don't like it when a man can't produce fire, make sure they see you as not being a wus. Create fire!

Girls also like electricity. Show them your mastery of it. Remove the wall plate from any switch close to you. Remove the switch it's self and discard it. You won't need it anymore. Attach a wire to the black wire in the box and another one to the white wire. Be careful, don't touch the copper part. Make sure they are nice and tight, wire nuts work well for this. Make sure the wires are long enough to reach several feet out of the box. Now when you are ready to impress them start screaming at the top of you lungs "I am the master of light, bow to my greatness", as soon as you get doing yelling push a wire into each one of your nipples. If they are not impressed they are not worth your time. Good luck.

"The President does not have power under the Constitution to unilaterally authorize a military attack in a situation that does not involve stopping an actual or imminent threat to the nation" - Barack Obama (a freshman senator from Illinios)

2008-07-28 02:23:15

#7

AussieReaper: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°); +5,761|6610|what

Put on the Borat movie. Chicks love seeing the naked fight scene. It will get them in the mood for what's to come later.

2008-07-28 04:38:16

#8

RavyGravy: Son.; +617|6863|NSW, Australia

that fort is the shit

2008-07-28 04:42:43

#9

Parker: isteal; +1,452|6851|The Gem Saloon

GodFather wrote:
I already built a fort with my friend, because were awesome like that.
http://img133.imageshack.us/img133/9125/fortloveas0.jpg

so let me get this right?
you have hot girls coming over....so you and your friend decided to build a monument to unintentional abstinence?
you built the fucking anti-poon?

jesus christ...

do you two NOT like pussy?

2008-07-28 04:46:13

#10

Surgeons: U shud proabbly f off u fat prik; +3,097|6947|Gogledd Cymru

Parker, it's called Fort Rape for a reason, it doesn't matter if the girls like it or not.

2008-07-28 04:48:23

#11

GodFather: Blademaster's bottom bitch; +387|6677|Phoenix, AZ

Parker wrote:
GodFather wrote:
I already built a fort with my friend, because were awesome like that.
http://img133.imageshack.us/img133/9125/fortloveas0.jpg
so let me get this right?
you have hot girls coming over....so you and your friend decided to build a monument to unintentional abstinence?
you built the fucking anti-poon?

jesus christ...

do you two NOT like pussy?

GodFather wrote:
well the fort was done simply for the lulz, and my friend was like, "We were going to call it fort rape... but..." and she was like, "well its not rape if I want to wink"

Theyre cool girls and its just a joke, weve chilled with them plenty of times before and they know were not losers that actually build forts because we think its cool

so stop busting my balls on the fort big_smile

2008-07-28 04:52:06

#12

Parker: isteal; +1,452|6851|The Gem Saloon

well, good luck with the eleventeen year olds.
maybe after they are done romping around in the homo erotic playhouse, you can set up the slip 'n slide...

2008-07-28 04:55:26

#13

GodFather: Blademaster's bottom bitch; +387|6677|Phoenix, AZ

Parker wrote:
slip 'n slide...

awesome idea

edit: do they even make those any more?

Last edited by GodFather (2008-07-28 04:57:29)

2008-07-28 04:56:07

#14

Surgeons: U shud proabbly f off u fat prik; +3,097|6947|Gogledd Cymru

Just rape them in the fort and put it on youtube already

2008-07-28 04:58:38

#15

RavyGravy: Son.; +617|6863|NSW, Australia

GodFather wrote:
Parker wrote:
slip 'n slide...
awesome idea

edit: do they even make those any more?

i think tarp works

2008-07-28 05:00:20

#16

dtacs: say that 2 my face fucker not online; +126|6292|Australia

XxRavenxX wrote:
GodFather wrote:
Parker wrote:
slip 'n slide...
awesome idea

edit: do they even make those any more?
i think tarp works

i just use gravel roads

2008-07-28 05:00:41

#17

GodFather: Blademaster's bottom bitch; +387|6677|Phoenix, AZ

The Sheriff wrote:
Just rape them in the fort and put it on youtube already

and she was like, "well its not rape if I want to wink"

2008-07-28 05:00:43

#18

i g: Banned; +876|6321|GA

hmm that fort brings back memories...
we were in miami for the phish new years eve concerts in december of '03. after one of the shows, we decided to make a "box tent" with a king size comforter. there was a total of 7 of us, and we each had a pipe. 7 pipes boxing out one little hotel room. some friends were meeting us at the hotel, and they said as soon as they got off the elevator, they could smell the smoke. after about 30 minutes, a cop showed up at the door and told us to keep that shit outside

on topic: get high in the fort

2008-07-28 05:01:00

#19

Mekstizzle: WALKER; +3,611|7078|London, England

XxRavenxX wrote:
that fort is the shit

2008-07-28 05:01:53

#20

FFLink: There is.; +1,380|7148|Devon, England

Ha ha, love the fort... Last one I saw made was one in History class...

I guarantee they will love the fort

2008-07-28 05:04:02

#21

Mekstizzle: WALKER; +3,611|7078|London, England

If you break the fort whilst you're doing your business with your girl inside, consider that a successful siege. Also say that out loud when it happens.

2008-07-28 05:05:00

#22

GodFather: Blademaster's bottom bitch; +387|6677|Phoenix, AZ

i g wrote:
hmm that fort brings back memories...
we were in miami for the phish new years eve concerts in december of '03. after one of the shows, we decided to make a "box tent" with a king size comforter. there was a total of 7 of us, and we each had a pipe. 7 pipes boxing out one little hotel room. some friends were meeting us at the hotel, and they said as soon as they got off the elevator, they could smell the smoke. after about 30 minutes, a cop showed up at the door and told us to keep that shit outside

on topic: get high in the fort

lmfao very nice.
If I smoked I would, but then thats random shit around the house, that will then reek of weed, which would not be good :\
(brother has felony for possession charges and my dad would be ALL over my nuts for ever if he found out I was smoking)

Mek-Stizzle wrote:
XxRavenxX wrote:
that fort is the shit

Thank you.

edit:

I love how the entire beginning posts were basically, "If you want to get anywhere with these girls then tear the fort down"
and now its mostly, "Awesome fort." or something along the lines of agreeing with the awesomeness of a shit ass fort built for the lulz in the middle of the living room

Last edited by GodFather (2008-07-28 05:09:01)

2008-07-28 05:12:16

#23

i g: Banned; +876|6321|GA

GodFather wrote:
lmfao very nice.
If I smoked I would, but then thats random shit around the house, that will then reek of weed, which would not be good :\
(brother has felony for possession charges and my dad would be ALL over my nuts for ever if he found out I was smoking)

i am not condoning its use, but weed smell goes away after an hour or 2 at the most.

2008-07-28 05:17:06

#24

GodFather: Blademaster's bottom bitch; +387|6677|Phoenix, AZ

i g wrote:
GodFather wrote:
lmfao very nice.
If I smoked I would, but then thats random shit around the house, that will then reek of weed, which would not be good :\
(brother has felony for possession charges and my dad would be ALL over my nuts for ever if he found out I was smoking)
i am not condoning its use, but weed smell goes away after an hour or 2 at the most.

Really? In heavy fabrics?

I mean I can always smell the blaze on my brother when ever he comes home, just that light musky weed scent...

Even if there were ways to get away with it, I wouldn't start smoking, just like cigarettes, I will probably like them (I know I'm comparing something addictive and something non-addictive) and I will probably want more, which means I need cash, which means I need to acquire cash, which means extra work, and I usually try to slide by, I don't want to end up funding anything else

2008-07-28 05:38:44

#25

eskimo_sammyjoe: Did someone say tea?; +112|6692|S.A. Australia

Me and my mate made a fort once and it was the awesomness of the fort that got him over the line with a chick he liked, so the fort stays.

Serious Flex

BF2S Forums I have the house to myself for another 6 days

GodFather wrote:

Parker wrote:

GodFather wrote:

GodFather wrote:

Parker wrote:

GodFather wrote:

Parker wrote:

XxRavenxX wrote:

GodFather wrote:

Parker wrote:

The Sheriff wrote:

XxRavenxX wrote:

i g wrote:

Mek-Stizzle wrote:

XxRavenxX wrote:

GodFather wrote:

i g wrote:

GodFather wrote:

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