Penis Tester: The Erectile Quality Monitor Review

2009-02-22 20:59:56

#1

Harmor: Error_Name_Not_Found; +605|6956|San Diego, CA, USA

https://img403.imageshack.us/img403/7782/eqm.jpg

Gizmodo wrote:
Jesus and I tested out the erectile quality monitor gadget (different units!) to see if it was actually useful, or if it was just telling you what you could easily see for yourself.

First we need to be clear on what this is for. The EQM measures your maximum erectile quality, so to properly test it, you'll have to make sure you're at maximum erectness. Then, press the EQM to the tip as hard as your junk will allow without bending, then see how you score on a scale of 500 grams to 2000 grams (higher is better). It's called "axial rigidity", and it's the type of rigidity that's "needed for penetration."

Source: http://i.gizmodo.com/5154573/the-erecti … tor-review

Gives a whole new meaning to "Build it an they will come."

2009-02-22 21:03:45

#2

Whiplash: Future Aviator; +40|6188|Central Texas

I'd be like 3000 grams.

2009-02-22 21:05:43

#3

Pochsy: Artifice of Eternity; +702|5950|Toronto

I just can't imagine having to stop right before sex and telling the girl "oh hold on, let me make sure I'm hard enough baby" haha.

The shape of an eye in front of the ocean, digging for stones and throwing them against its window pane. Take it down dreamer, take it down deep. - Other Families

2009-02-22 21:05:43

#4

War Man: Australians are hermaphrodites.; +564|7121|Purplicious Wisconsin

I'd be about 1 BILLION GRAMS

The irony of guns, is that they can save lives.

2009-02-22 21:07:46

#5

Macbeth: Banned; +2,444|5993

I would buy this out of pure curiosity but I'd be really embarrassed if anyone found it.

2009-02-22 21:07:50

#6

gnot<3: Leave blank to use forum default.; +45|5962

its for insecure men TBH, feel sorry for the ones that are gonna buy it, lmao

2009-02-22 21:10:22

#7

Roc18: `; +655|6198|PROLLLY PROLLLY PROLLLY

I'd probably break it, there is no point in me wasting my money.

https://g.bf3stats.com/pc/gcv8Vckg/roc18.png

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2009-02-22 21:10:27

#8

FatherTed: xD; +3,936|6907|so randum

gnot<3 wrote:
its for insecure men TBH, feel sorry for the ones that are gonna buy it, lmao

i think you're projecting.

Small hourglass island
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella

2009-02-22 21:11:06

#9

Macbeth: Banned; +2,444|5993

gnot<3 wrote:
its for insecure men TBH, feel sorry for the ones that are gonna buy it, lmao

Insecure = | = curious

Perhaps your insecurity is stopping you from exploring things that spur your curiosity.

Last edited by Macbeth (2009-02-22 21:11:24)

2009-02-22 21:11:48

#10

usmarine: Banned; +2,785|7169

Mek would put it in his mouth for you first

2009-02-22 21:13:35

#11

gnot<3: Leave blank to use forum default.; +45|5962

oh dear, it seems like I offended some peps, soz

to make things better for your "sex life", find a girl that loves you for who are you, not what you're packing

gl&hf

2009-02-22 21:16:30

#12

Eagle: Togs8896 is my evil alter ego; +567|7038|New Hampshire, USA

Whiplash wrote:
I'd be like 30 grams.

At least you're honest

https://static.bf2s.com/files/user/14407/Sig_Pats.jpg

2009-02-22 21:17:00

#13

AussieReaper: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°); +5,761|6560|what

gnot<3 wrote:
to make things better for your "sex life", find a girl that loves you for who are you, not what you're packing

And if she ever questions your sex life, just whip it out and show her the results of this thing.

2009-02-22 21:18:43

#14

Flaming_Maniac: prince of insufficient light; +2,490|7114|67.222.138.85

Surely there are different levels, a la breaking boards? It would suck if you bought it and it ended up being a one shot deal.

2009-02-22 21:19:34

#15

gnot<3: Leave blank to use forum default.; +45|5962

AussieReaper wrote:
gnot<3 wrote:
to make things better for your "sex life", find a girl that loves you for who are you, not what you're packing
And if she ever questions your sex life, just whip it out and show her the results of this thing.

I'll just borrow the device from one of these members here. haha, just messssin

2009-02-22 22:10:26

#16

mcgid1: Meh...; +129|7124|Austin, TX/San Antonio, TX

1. wat

2. It's "If you build it they will come"

3. Unless you're like 50 and having issues which require the use of viagra, you really shouldn't need something like this.

2009-02-22 22:19:06

#17

rdx-fx: ...; +955|6998

Lightweights

Hell, THIS is how I test my erections!
(Safe for work variant, of course)

Or, silly me, I just use said erection with a particular willing female of the species. Imagine that.
Let her be the judge of it.

Last edited by rdx-fx (2009-02-22 22:19:44)

2009-02-22 22:20:33

#18

Flaming_Maniac: prince of insufficient light; +2,490|7114|67.222.138.85

I am now imagining the maneuvers necessary to generate the needed momentum for said acts of manliness.

2009-02-22 22:22:45

#19

rdx-fx: ...; +955|6998

Flaming_Maniac wrote:
I am now imagining the maneuvers necessary to generate the needed momentum for said acts of manliness.

I'm sure Liquidat0r has the necessary equations handy.

2009-02-22 22:25:04

#20

CrazeD: Member; +368|7080|Maine

Flaming_Maniac wrote:
I am now imagining the maneuvers necessary to generate the needed momentum for said acts of manliness.

1. Place blocks at roughly knee height.

2. Take hand, palm side up, under penis.

3. Pin penis against stomach.

4. In one rapid movement, release penis while simultaneously squatting.

2009-02-22 22:31:16

#21

Freezer7Pro: I don't come here a lot anymore.; +1,447|6604|Winland

CrazeD wrote:
Flaming_Maniac wrote:
I am now imagining the maneuvers necessary to generate the needed momentum for said acts of manliness.
1. Place blocks at roughly knee height.

2. Take hand, palm side up, under penis.

3. Pin penis against stomach.

4. In one rapid movement, release penis while simultaneously squatting.

I see you're highly experienced.

The idea of any hi-fi system is to reproduce the source material as faithfully as possible, and to deliberately add distortion to everything you hear (due to amplifier deficiencies) because it sounds 'nice' is simply not high fidelity. If that is what you want to hear then there is no problem with that, but by adding so much additional material (by way of harmonics and intermodulation) you have a tailored sound system, not a hi-fi. - Rod Elliot, ESP

2009-02-22 22:31:30

#22

rdx-fx: ...; +955|6998

CrazeD wrote:
Flaming_Maniac wrote:
I am now imagining the maneuvers necessary to generate the needed momentum for said acts of manliness.
1. Place blocks at roughly knee height.

2. Take hand, palm side up, under penis.

3. Pin penis against stomach.

4. In one rapid movement, release penis while simultaneously squatting.

I'm more of a "free recoil" proponent. Pelvic thrust up, then reverse. More of an "as used" testing method.

Much like the method used to split firewood logs. You can use an axe, if you must..

2009-02-23 00:17:38

#23

RavyGravy: Son.; +617|6813|NSW, Australia

War Man wrote:
I'd be about 1 BILLION GRAMS

oh yeah

2009-02-23 00:24:17

#24

AussieReaper: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°); +5,761|6560|what

RavyGravy wrote:
War Man wrote:
I'd be about 1 BILLION GRAMS
oh yeah

Did you know that 42,553,191 McDonalds Big Macs equals
- 1.063 billion grams of protein
- 1.276 billion grams of fat
- 3.404 billion mg of cholesterol
- 136 billion ounces of beef patty
and 10.64 billion mg of calcium

?

2009-02-23 00:28:40

#25

DonFck: Hibernator; +3,227|7039|Finland

AussieReaper wrote:
RavyGravy wrote:
War Man wrote:
I'd be about 1 BILLION GRAMS
oh yeah
Did you know that 42,553,191 McDonalds Big Macs equals
- 1.063 billion grams of protein
- 1.276 billion grams of fat
- 3.404 billion mg of cholesterol
- 136 billion ounces of beef patty
and 10.64 billion mg of calcium

?

https://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w274/willzweigart/the_more_you_know.jpg

I see no use for such a contraption. "Hey baby, I just checked by erectile status with this machine here and I'm hard as a rock. What do you say we drink these and go over to my room?"

I need around tree fiddy.

BF2S Forums Penis Tester: The Erectile Quality Monitor Review

Gizmodo wrote:

gnot<3 wrote:

gnot<3 wrote:

Whiplash wrote:

gnot<3 wrote:

AussieReaper wrote:

gnot<3 wrote:

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

CrazeD wrote:

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

CrazeD wrote:

Flaming_Maniac wrote:

War Man wrote:

RavyGravy wrote:

War Man wrote:

AussieReaper wrote:

RavyGravy wrote:

War Man wrote:

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