BF2S Forums EE Chats June

Depending upon a woman's anatomy...and just how close her clitoris is placed to her vagina sex feels one of several ways.

1. With the clitoris located in a galaxy far far away, it feels as if something huge and forceful is repeatedly and enthusiastically beating itself upon the walls of her inner self; quite similar to something of the same sort doing so to a nostril which only has the capacity to open just so far. If the partner is a well-endowed partner, it hurts like a mother until it eventually become numb. IF, and this is a huge IF, the partner takes the time to gently stimulate the woman by massaging her in places, kissing her, and tenderly touching her, then it doesn't actually hurt, but it still feels like one might have a happy Jimmy Dean Sausage doing its best to have a little one-on-one time in the Kitchen of Love. If the King of Sausages knows what is good for him and if he wishes to retain his...authenticity of Sausageness, he had better learn how to please his woman or else he's Soup. NO woman is going to put up having sex all the time when she could get the same feeling from running her toothbrush under the hot water tap in the sink and having at it.

2. If the clitoris of the woman is nearby, or somewhere in the same neighborhood, then all of this "drive through in and out burger stuff" will make her insane. Why? Because only now and again will SHE ever feel any of that special love; meanwhile Jimmy Dean is about to make himself another cooking show. She will become so very frustrated and possibly enraged, Mr. Jimmy had better do one of two things: RUN or learn how to actually please a woman. It's not as easy as it might sound. Why? Because men never ask for directions.

3. The woman who is actually anatomically perfect (less than 20% of us at last count), still needs to be touched and loved up some before Jimmy's grand entrance. Why? Look... you have to heat up the car on a cold winter's day before it can be driven, yeah? It's the same thing with a woman. When you finally get down to it, and are making lovely Jimmy Dean Sausage Biscuits, the feeling of orgasm is the same for both. Only women generally don't roll over and go to sleep afterwards. They hand you a quiz.

More on this fascinating subject later...

Jaekus wrote:

Depending upon a woman's anatomy...and just how close her clitoris is placed to her vagina sex feels one of several ways.

1. With the clitoris located in a galaxy far far away, it feels as if something huge and forceful is repeatedly and enthusiastically beating itself upon the walls of her inner self; quite similar to something of the same sort doing so to a nostril which only has the capacity to open just so far. If the partner is a well-endowed partner, it hurts like a mother until it eventually become numb. IF, and this is a huge IF, the partner takes the time to gently stimulate the woman by massaging her in places, kissing her, and tenderly touching her, then it doesn't actually hurt, but it still feels like one might have a happy Jimmy Dean Sausage doing its best to have a little one-on-one time in the Kitchen of Love. If the King of Sausages knows what is good for him and if he wishes to retain his...authenticity of Sausageness, he had better learn how to please his woman or else he's Soup. NO woman is going to put up having sex all the time when she could get the same feeling from running her toothbrush under the hot water tap in the sink and having at it.

2. If the clitoris of the woman is nearby, or somewhere in the same neighborhood, then all of this "drive through in and out burger stuff" will make her insane. Why? Because only now and again will SHE ever feel any of that special love; meanwhile Jimmy Dean is about to make himself another cooking show. She will become so very frustrated and possibly enraged, Mr. Jimmy had better do one of two things: RUN or learn how to actually please a woman. It's not as easy as it might sound. Why? Because men never ask for directions.

3. The woman who is actually anatomically perfect (less than 20% of us at last count), still needs to be touched and loved up some before Jimmy's grand entrance. Why? Look... you have to heat up the car on a cold winter's day before it can be driven, yeah? It's the same thing with a woman. When you finally get down to it, and are making lovely Jimmy Dean Sausage Biscuits, the feeling of orgasm is the same for both. Only women generally don't roll over and go to sleep afterwards. They hand you a quiz.

More on this fascinating subject later...

Kmar wrote:

This is how you commencement speech.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELC_e2QB … r_embedded
tldw; Life isn't fair.

Spamtheban wrote:

yeah tell me about it