Any Origional Funny jokes of your own?

2006-08-01 19:19:18

#1

SealXo: Member; +309|6949

Heres a couple.

1)

Q) Why does Israel have the desert eagle?
A)Because when the police have to shoot a jewish guy with an attorney they dont want him getting up.

2)

Q)Whys smoky the bear hate condoms?
A)he doesnt like people burning rubber
(made up in pe)

2006-08-01 20:31:15

#2

younggun: Member; +28|7057

No real jokes but I do make up lots of funny statements...unfortunately I can only use them once...so yeh

2006-08-01 20:31:22

#3

Brasso: member; +1,549|7043

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side.

LOLOLOLOLZ!!!111

"people in ny have a general idea of how to drive. one of the pedals goes forward the other one prevents you from dying"

2006-08-01 20:33:19

#4

rmilhous: Member; +32|6941|Augusta, Georgia

How do you circumsize people from Alabama?

Kick their sister in the jaw

2006-08-01 20:33:42

#5

Papa Smurf 314: Right in the Smurfin' parking lot?; +90|7183|New York

haffeysucks wrote:
Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side.

LOLOLOLOLZ!!!111

I think i've heard that one before.

2006-08-01 20:35:21

#6

Madhadda1: Member; +270|6958|Cedar Rapids, Iowa

"did you here about the pagent for the little girls?" (waits for answer) "ya it was so big last year they had to hold it in one mom's personal emptyness" lol if you havnt seen thoughs things its pretty much moms that live through there little girls.

2006-08-01 20:35:41

#7

{BMF}*Frank_The_Tank: U.S. > Iran; +497|6991|Florida

haffeysucks wrote:
Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side.

LOLOLOLOLZ!!!111

TELL ME AGAIN!!!

What do you call a fish with no eye?

a) a Fsh.....Fsh....with no I.

Its really REALLY lame, and I can never thank my friend Derrek enough for getting that stuck in my head 6 years ago, but sometimes its dumb enough to actually make someone laugh.

2006-08-01 20:38:57

#8

SaladForks: /ph34r; +129|6995|Eastern USA

Knock Knock!
Who's there?
I am.
HAHAHAHAHAHA!

...

2006-08-01 20:40:04

#9

BigmacK: Back from the Dead.; +628|7164|Chicago.

I suck at jokes.

Oh well. Keep in mind, this was situational, in the middle of a BF2 game. Ready? Lets go!

Friend: Dude, why is there like an ammo meter for the wrench? Does it mean as its gone, I repair slower?
Me: Exactly. Give it time. Your arm needs to reload.
Friend: XD

You might not find it funny, but I do not care. I thought it was funny, so did he, and I posted it here as a joke that I made up.

Yay.

2006-08-01 20:40:51

#10

Ganko_06: Laughter with an S; +167|7058|Camoran's Paradise

Technically this is original since I thought of it on my own only to see it later on the internet. GAHHH.

A study says that 4 out of 5 who take a new pill people suffer from diarrhea. Does the fifth one enjoy it?

Last edited by Ganko_06 (2006-08-01 20:42:27)

2006-08-01 20:51:33

#11

eagles1106: Member; +269|6997|Marlton, New Jersey.

A canadian is eating crossiants(bread) for breakfast along with jelly in a restraunt. An american with chewing gum in his mouth walks in. The American says "do Canadians eat all the bread?" The canadian says "yes". The american says "we dont, we eat only the inside and then recycle to crust and sell it to Canada as bread". The american then said, "do you use jelly with your bread". The canadian said "yes". The american said "well we eat fresh fruit, and recycle the peels and waste and sell it to canada as jelly". The Canadian then got pissed and noticed the american's gum in his mouth. The canadian said "do you have sex in America?"...the american said "hell yeah"...the canadian then said "what do you do with the condoms you use?" The American said "we throw them out". The Canadian said "well we dont throw them out, when were done condoms we recycle them, melt them so they can be chewed and sell it to america as chewing gum", as the american slowly stops chewing the gum in his mouth

lol im american, and i know this bashes the american dude, but hey, its a joke!

2006-08-01 22:58:09

#12

jkohlc: 2142th Whore; +214|6939|Singapore

two men walked into a bar...ouch ouch..

2006-08-01 23:50:47

#13

dhoar4: Banned; +151|6948|Forest Lake, Australia

Q: Why do New Zealanders drink from plates?

A: Because Australia has all the cups

lol...Ah...I love being Aussie

Last edited by dhoar4 (2006-08-01 23:51:13)

2006-08-02 00:03:12

#14

Cougar: Banned; +1,962|7177|Dallas

Two flies are sitting on a piece of shit. One fly farts and the other one looks at him and says "HEY, I'm tryin ta eat here!"

Not sure where I picked that up at.

2006-08-02 00:12:36

#15

4_Phucsache: Property of BF2s©; +112|6995|Brisbane Australia

dhoar4 wrote:
Q: Why do New Zealanders drink from plates?

A: Because Australia has all the cups

lol...Ah...I love being Aussie

+1 for a week my fine friend...thats a bloody great joke

2006-08-02 00:13:27

#16

Big McLargehuge: Another Saturday night and I ain't got nobody; +259|7016|Philadelphia, PA

This is a variation of a classic joke.

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender says "hey, who's fuckin horse is that?"

2006-08-02 00:14:20

#17

sR.:.crimson_viper911: Member; +1|6921

2 nuts were walking down the street. one was assulted!

LoLz0rz!!1!!11!!one!1

2006-08-02 00:40:16

#18

4_Phucsache: Property of BF2s©; +112|6995|Brisbane Australia

Why do Elephants paint thier balls red.....to hide in apple trees

How did Tarzan die.....picking apples....

2006-08-02 00:50:17

#19

Bubbalo: The Lizzard; +541|6974

Hitler walks into a bar, and sitting on the bench is a black man, a Jew, and a paraplegic. He walks up to the owner and says "Why isn't my pizza in the oven yet?".

Sick, I know. My friend claims he made it up, but I suspect he stole it from somewhere and claimed it as his own.

2006-08-02 01:00:22

#20

Bernadictus: Moderator; +1,055|7150

A Belgian, Dutch and a German are standing near a wishing pool. The Belgian jumps off the diver-board and wishes for litres of Beer, and he lands in a pool full of beer. The Dutch jumps off the board and whishes for a pool full of gold, and he lands in a pool full of gold.

Then the German runs on the board to jump, but slips and falls into the pool shouting scheisse.

2006-08-02 01:10:10

#21

Varegg: Support fanatic :-); +2,206|7223|Nårvei

How come blond girls are sore around their naval ? .......... because blond boys ain't so smart either !

Wait behind the line ..............................................................

2006-08-02 01:24:25

#22

SkoobyDu: 'CLICK JOIN NOW'... OK lets go... BOOM!!!! =FFS=; +120|6974|Cheshire, UK

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school.

Usually she slept through class.

One day the teacher tried to catch little April out to see if she was paying attention in class. She called on her while she was napping.

"Tell me, April, who created the universe?"

When April didn't stir. Little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pen and jabbed her in the rear.

"GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, Very good, and April fell back asleep.

A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our lord and saviour,"

But April didn't even stir from her slumber.

Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.

"JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very Good,"

And April fell back asleep.

Then the teacher asked April a third question.

"What did Eve say to Adam after she had had their twenty third child?"

And once again Johnny jabbed her with the pen. This time April jumped up and shouted, IF YOU STICK THAT F###ING THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOU'RE A#SE!"

2006-08-02 01:27:30

#23

Drexor: Member; +33|7026|Denmark

knock knock.?

whoes there?

you are an idiot.....

2006-08-02 01:27:58

#24

DonFck: Hibernator; +3,227|7045|Finland

A bands bassplayer and drummer drove to their gig venue with the drummers car. They arrived in good time before the gig. Most of the gear had already been roaded with a minibus with the lead guitarist and singer. The drummer had only his little bag of drumsticks, which he took with him, got up from the car and slammed the door shut, but he forgot the keys in the ignition!

It took two hours to get the bassplayer out of the car.

Last edited by DonFck (2006-08-02 01:28:21)

I need around tree fiddy.

2006-08-02 08:48:34

#25

CC-Marley: Member; +407|7242

What did the snowman ask the other snowman?

https://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a278/CC-Marley/images.jpg

Do you smell carrots?

Last edited by CC-Marley (2006-08-02 08:54:35)

BF2S Forums Any Origional Funny jokes of your own?

haffeysucks wrote:

haffeysucks wrote:

dhoar4 wrote:

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