My Dilemma...

2006-12-28 07:47:26

#1

I.M.I Militant: We Are Not Alone In Here; +297|7158|Melbourne, Australia

hey guys before i get down to it here are some notes
- this is a thread asking for advice about my relationship with my gf
so all you pre pubesent fuktards have enuf respect to just leave rather then post your bs i realy cbf with it tonight
-please excuse my bad grammar i am trying realy hard to improve (hopefully you can read it) =]
_------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Ok so i am 16 so is my girlfriend. we have been togather almost 2 months yes i know it isent that long but is the only real relationship either of us have had

i love her and have told her that (about a week ago)
so we are laying on my bed (just kissing an stuff nothing seriouse) and she tells me that she loves me i was very happy about it the night was just getting better and better

but all good things must come to a end and she had to go home. when she left i jumped on msn and 5 - 10 mins later she loged on we just talked for a while about random shit anyways we talked about these new ultra thin condoms i seen o nthe tv she said when we have sex (which wont be for a very long time) she wouldnet want me using one of those because they looked very unsafe so i joked around and said "ok ill just get a vasectomy for ya then" to which she replied "well that might be a problem when you want kids" i got a little curious as to why she said "me" and not "we" (she had told me before she would like kids) i asked "why did you say me and not us unless you dont plan on being with me when kids actully become a possibility" then she said "well no i dont ..sorry babe"

WHAT... THE ... FUCK we agreed to have a serious slow relationship she said she loved me i love her and she doesent even wanna be with me?

ok now you guys might think im taking this way overboard i am well aware the chances we are togather when kids become a factor are extremly slim but i would very much love to have kids with her i love her so much and i thought thats what love was about how can you love someone and not want to be with them this realy botherd me i just said "cya" and loged .. i think she is aware of what prompted me to leave like that but she has been avoiding it and going on like everything is all peaches.. i want to tell her "listen if you dont want a seriouse relationship i realy dont want to be with you because that is what i want and if we keep goin like this i will just end up getting hurt" but im afraid of breaking up with her because i would be realy realy heartbroken .. i wont lie guys i was just in the shower in fuken tears.. its 2:47am and im writing this i cannot get to sleep i dont know what to do =[ PLEASE HELP

2006-12-28 07:50:58

#2

ShowMeTheMonkey: Member; +125|7141

Remember dude. You're 16. You're going to have plenty of other relationships after her. Take it as she DOES want to be with you, just not want kids with you! You've got plenty of time to find someone to have kids with.

2006-12-28 07:52:56

#3

I.M.I Militant: We Are Not Alone In Here; +297|7158|Melbourne, Australia

ShowMeTheMonkey wrote:
Remember dude. You're 16. You're going to have plenty of other relationships after her. Take it as she DOES want to be with you, just not want kids with you! You've got plenty of time to find someone to have kids with.

yer i get told that alot "your 16 just have fun dont take every relationship so seriously" but i cant help it thats just me.. but how can you say you love someone yet not want to be with them forever...

2006-12-28 07:56:38

#4

ncc6206: =BIG= BAD AND UGLY; +36|6918

Get it and go. There are plenty of other chicks out there. Get your fill before you settle down. Right now its teen hormones that are driving your heart. Once those hormones are "released" you will see that there are better fields out there to plow. Sorry for the country colloquiallism , I am from Texas you know.

2006-12-28 07:57:44

#5

ShowMeTheMonkey: Member; +125|7141

I got the same thing, beautiful girl called Rose (Actually while I write this she's over in Sydney on holiday now) , she was 16 nearly 17 and I was just 17. We became intimate which was great, but then you have to realise that it is a serious relationship, but kids are a factor that come WAY later in life.

Yes take the relationship seriously, but remember that this isn;t the first and only relationship you'll ever have!

Though I know it's annoying the "You're only 16" arguement, but that is the biggest reason! Kids come around 29-38 NOT 16!.

2006-12-28 08:00:51

#6

crimson_grunt: Shitty Disposition (apparently); +214|7093|Teesside, UK

I.M.I Militant wrote:
yer i get told that alot "your 16 just have fun dont take every relationship so seriously" but i cant help it thats just me.. but how can you say you love someone yet not want to be with them forever...

People change over time. Try not to think too far ahead or things will never work. She may not be ready for kids now but that doesn't mean she never will.

2006-12-28 08:01:33

#7

heggs: Spamalamadingdong; +581|6827|New York

well, relationships are tricky to begin with. and people are even more tricky. it's a matter of finding the someone that happens to be going in the same direction, if you get my drift. remember, she's 16, you're 16, and stuff that like happening is a little ways off. i'm not busting your balls because your 16, mind you, just showing you your situation. maybe babies aren't in the cards for anyone, you or otherwise. it's all the way people are.

now, another thing you should keep in mind: people do change their minds. everyone does it, and pretty much all the time. she may say it now, but change her mind down the road (like in 2 years, when you have been through a lot together).

i'd say roll with it, and try not to let it get to you too much. it sucks, no doubt about that. one thing to keep in mind whatever happens: this is nothing worth killing yourself over.

Remember Me As A Time Of Day

2006-12-28 08:01:40

#8

ShowMeTheMonkey: Member; +125|7141

Just thought...... There's nothing stopping you from meeting back up in 15-20 years time and falling in love again!

2006-12-28 08:02:02

#9

I.M.I Militant: We Are Not Alone In Here; +297|7158|Melbourne, Australia

ShowMeTheMonkey wrote:
I got the same thing, beautiful girl called Rose (Actually while I write this she's over in Sydney on holiday now) , she was 16 nearly 17 and I was just 17. We became intimate which was great, but then you have to realise that it is a serious relationship, but kids are a factor that come WAY later in life.

Yes take the relationship seriously, but remember that this isn;t the first and only relationship you'll ever have!

Though I know it's annoying the "You're only 16" arguement, but that is the biggest reason! Kids come around 29-38 NOT 16!.

yes but what im saying is i dont plan on having kids for a long time late 20s maybe but i look at my relationship now and how much i love my gf and say to myself i would love for her to be the mother of my kids

but she doesent want me to (im just tryin to see how that makes our relationship a seriouse 1.. actully its not realy about how seriouse teh relationship is its more a fact of she tells me she loves me and says something like that just hours after saying it)

you know what.. im goin to bed.. i will talk to her about this 2morrow (god help me) if anyone wants to know i will pm them results thanks for your help guys +1 to all (dont karma me bak i hate people thinkin this is a lame attempt for attention/karma)

2006-12-28 08:11:34

#10

Cybargs: Moderated; +2,285|7155

Dude, just chill, She meant "we", But she's talking to you so yeah... don't worry man.

https://cache.www.gametracker.com/server_info/203.46.105.23:21300/b_350_20_692108_381007_FFFFFF_000000.png

2006-12-28 08:13:14

#11

alexilaiho68: Where's my coffee gone!?; +45|6938|Australia

cyborg_ninja-117 wrote:
Dude, just chill, She meant "we", But she's talking to you so yeah... don't worry man.

But she said that she doesnt see them together

2006-12-28 08:14:43

#12

Cybargs: Moderated; +2,285|7155

alexilaiho68 wrote:
cyborg_ninja-117 wrote:
Dude, just chill, She meant "we", But she's talking to you so yeah... don't worry man.
But she said that she doesnt see them together

Well in that case, move on or fuck her then dump her.

2006-12-28 08:18:46

#13

r'Eeee: That's how I roll, BITCH!; +311|6887

cyborg_ninja-117 wrote:
alexilaiho68 wrote:
cyborg_ninja-117 wrote:
Dude, just chill, She meant "we", But she's talking to you so yeah... don't worry man.
But she said that she doesnt see them together
Well in that case, move on or fuck her then dump her.

thats not a very good idea

2006-12-28 08:21:52

#14

ShowMeTheMonkey: Member; +125|7141

Cyborg shows his "years" of experiance in these matters.......

2006-12-28 08:25:13

#15

Cybargs: Moderated; +2,285|7155

ShowMeTheMonkey wrote:
Cyborg shows his "years" of experiance in these matters.......

Well, the solution is foolproof, hell do something before your breakup.

Last edited by cyborg_ninja-117 (2006-12-28 08:25:44)

2006-12-28 08:31:54

#16

Entertayner: Member; +826|7009

TBH, it's two months.. She may not have realised how much she loves you, give it time.. Move on and forget about it, it's not a big thing.. Kids are a big thing, i'm 15 and my GF and me have been goin out almost 6 months, there's no way we'd even think about having kids. All those people that are saying "you're 16, it's not a real relationship" are wrong, that's such a generalisation, I know so many older couples (parents of my friends) that met at school and are still together.

To be honest mate, enjoy her company, don't let something that is VERY unlikely to happen eat away at you, concentrate on the things that you love about her, if it's really bugging you that much talk to her about it, in a civilised way, chances are you will come out a stronger couple afterwards.

I need my own Agony Aunt forum tbh....

2006-12-28 08:33:10

#17

Jenkinsbball: Banned; +149|6987|USA bitches!

Like everyone else has said, you're only 16. You've dated her for 2 months, you don't really love her, trust me. Unless you've known her for years and years as a friend, you can't really learn anything about someone in 2 months.

I used to be like that. Dating was so strange to me, that just liking a person, to me, meant I loved them. I quickly realized that it didn't, and telling a girl/woman you love her when you really don't is a mistake. Just date her and have fun. Fuck her if she wants, don't pressure her into it, or it'll suck. Use her as your toy so that when you finally find the right one, years from now, you'll be good in the sack.

2006-12-28 08:44:59

#18

RicardoBlanco: The English; +177|7007|Oxford

You told her you loved her after a week?! That was the mistake, move on and learn from it, you'll be over her in a month guaranteed.

2006-12-28 08:46:35

#19

cablecopulate: Member; +449|7177|Massachusetts.

Ah, teenage angst. Get her virginity and lose her.

2006-12-28 08:48:48

#20

Smoke_Deez: Member; +8|6825

Play it cool, like most have said here you have a large part of your life ahead of you. Brush this off don't let it get to you, and definitely don't let her know it is bothering you. Don't sweat it for now, go about things like this never happened, things could still work out fine. Seems like you are too worked up about it, do something to settle yourself and get your mind off it... the battlefield is always there bud.

2006-12-28 09:02:52

#21

zeidmaan: Member; +234|6854|Vienna

on one hand I wouldnt even notice she said "you want" instead of "we want", also maybe she didnt say it on purpose.
Or maybe she is just very SMART. No guy wants to hear his GF talk about them having children, specialy after 2 months. Often girls get DUMPED after mentioning stuff like that. A mate of mine dumped a girl in the middle of sex because she mentioned kids. In that was the case she was a real sport, and you turned out to be an jackass and you should apologise to her

2006-12-28 09:07:01

#22

Kung Jew: That one mod; +331|7184|Houston, TX

Young love.... so furious. So passionate. So uninformed. You are young. Love has many facets to it that you have yet to experience. As you mature, so will the relationship. You will find new aspects in love that you hadn't previously taken into account. Maybe the current woman is the right one and you'll mature together, maybe she isn't. As you age, you discover more and more about yourself that you didn't previously acknowledge. These things will mold and guide your life, love, relationships, happiness, etc...

I look back on my high school love. It's a pity that the emotion that love produces is so overwhelming. It tends to "take over". The old saying that 'love is blinding'... it's true, in many, many aspects.

Try to remember:
Don't ever think you know everything - the future is never 100% certain.
Don't believe you are above evolution of yourself - Self improvement is an art that is skillfully denied by many.
Don't love the feeling of being loved, love the person. - If you don't love the person who is giving you that love, what are you gonna do when you get tired of them?

Good luck bro,
Plenty o fish in that ocean.

KJ

2006-12-28 09:47:36

#23

FFLink: There is.; +1,380|7130|Devon, England

I would personally say that her opinion to the word "love" isn't a very good one, so she said it and meant it, but according to her, maybe it isn't a big deal.

Good luck with it all, hope you sort things through for the best

2006-12-28 12:18:57

#24

Knifey McStabstab: Don't lock my topic!; +32|6947|Indiana

Put a hole in the condom beforehand, then she won't really have a choice.

2006-12-28 17:37:10

#25

I.M.I Militant: We Are Not Alone In Here; +297|7158|Melbourne, Australia

RicardoBlanco wrote:
You told her you loved her after a week?! That was the mistake, move on and learn from it, you'll be over her in a month guaranteed.

wtf .. 2 weeks .. noo... it was more 9 weeks :p

BF2S Forums My Dilemma...

ShowMeTheMonkey wrote:

I.M.I Militant wrote:

ShowMeTheMonkey wrote:

cyborg_ninja-117 wrote:

alexilaiho68 wrote:

cyborg_ninja-117 wrote:

cyborg_ninja-117 wrote:

alexilaiho68 wrote:

cyborg_ninja-117 wrote:

ShowMeTheMonkey wrote:

RicardoBlanco wrote:

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