So I go to the swimming pool at my apartment yesterday to catch some sun (because I'm white as fuck) and swim a few laps, but when I get down there, the deep section of the pool and the hot-tub are closed for maintence and the only thing open is the shallow "kiddie pool". I think to myself, "ok no biggie, I can do laps here and then GTFO", because I hate children nearly as much as stupid people. This feeling was reinforced 3 fold after what I saw that day.
There was this kid at the pool, couldn't have been more than 6 or 7 years old, splashing everyone, yelling and screaming, running around and just being a pain in the ass in general. Whats worse was the fact that his dad is sitting there watching him and not saying or doing anything about it despite the fact that the other people in the pool were obviously annoyed. But the best part came when the dad told the kid to get out because it was time to go home. The kid just ignores him and continues to play and swim and be an annoying little shit. The dad starts yelling at him to get out of the pool and the kid stands in the middle of the pool and starts screaming "I DON'T WANNA, LEAVE ME ALONE BUTTHOLE!". The dad then proceeded to beg, yes beg his son to please come out of the pool and then tried to bribe him with pizza. The kid just ignores him and keeps swimming. After about 25 minutes of begging and pleading the dad FINALLY grabs the little shit out of the pool and starts to dry him off as the kid screams bloody murder.
Now, I'm sorry, but what the fucking hell? If that had been my kid, after the second time I said get out and he wasn't out, someone would be getting an ass whipping, and if the little shit called me a butthole......well, I would have beat that kid into a speech impediment. People are to goddamned soft on their children, we think people are selfish, self centered and spoiled today? Wait 15-20 years until todays children grow up, then life is going to suck. If you are a parent and you don't beat your kids, you are wrong and you fail as a parent. As a matter of fact, if you are a parent and you don't beat your kids, someone should beat you for being a fucking faggot.
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While we are on the subject of parents, I would just like to say that my remaining parent is retarded. Have you ever gotten those Publisher's Clearinghouse spam letters in your mailbox saying "YOU'VE WON 800 TRILLION DOLLARS!!!" but right below it says in small print "If you subscribe to 47 magazines and enter the sweepstakes and sell your first born child and suck Ed McMahons cock, you might be eligible. Yeah, my mom (maternal) has been receiving those and now thinks that she is a millionaire and her money will show up any day now. She calls me every day to tell me she won another 7 million dollars despite the fact shes been winning for 5 months now and hasn't seen a dime. My mom isn't very smart. Sometimes thats good though, like the time I had her thinking she must have spilled some Cool Whip somewhere because there was white fluffy stuff all over the floor, but in reality I had actually covered her Jack Russell terrier in shaving cream and then let it go or the three month period I had in school where I got an extra dollar for snacks at school everyday because I had her believe that I was sponsoring a starving African child on the Sally Strothers program.
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The Democrats had their National debate this weekend. No one cared.
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I'll finish this weeks article with a joke:
A slick, well groomed and sharp looking marine walks into a bathroom at a crowded airport wearing his dress uniform and sees a young boy staring at him. He walks up to the boy and says "Why hello son, how are you today?" The boy looks up at him and say "OHH WOW, are you a REAL Marine!?". The marine looks at him and says "Why yes son, I am, would you like to wear my hat?". The boy, excited as all hell agrees and starts marching back and forth in front of the mirror, saluting himself and the such when an old sailor strolls into the bathroom, uniform looking like shit, shoes that look like they were shined with a brick, about 4 days worth of beard growth and alcohol on the breath. The boy runs up to the sailor and says "OHH WOW, are you a real Sailor!?". The sailor looks at the boy and says, "Fuck yeah kid, you want to suck my dick?". The kid just looks back up at him and says, "Ohh no, I'm not a real marine, I'm just wearing his hat."
There was this kid at the pool, couldn't have been more than 6 or 7 years old, splashing everyone, yelling and screaming, running around and just being a pain in the ass in general. Whats worse was the fact that his dad is sitting there watching him and not saying or doing anything about it despite the fact that the other people in the pool were obviously annoyed. But the best part came when the dad told the kid to get out because it was time to go home. The kid just ignores him and continues to play and swim and be an annoying little shit. The dad starts yelling at him to get out of the pool and the kid stands in the middle of the pool and starts screaming "I DON'T WANNA, LEAVE ME ALONE BUTTHOLE!". The dad then proceeded to beg, yes beg his son to please come out of the pool and then tried to bribe him with pizza. The kid just ignores him and keeps swimming. After about 25 minutes of begging and pleading the dad FINALLY grabs the little shit out of the pool and starts to dry him off as the kid screams bloody murder.
Now, I'm sorry, but what the fucking hell? If that had been my kid, after the second time I said get out and he wasn't out, someone would be getting an ass whipping, and if the little shit called me a butthole......well, I would have beat that kid into a speech impediment. People are to goddamned soft on their children, we think people are selfish, self centered and spoiled today? Wait 15-20 years until todays children grow up, then life is going to suck. If you are a parent and you don't beat your kids, you are wrong and you fail as a parent. As a matter of fact, if you are a parent and you don't beat your kids, someone should beat you for being a fucking faggot.
----
While we are on the subject of parents, I would just like to say that my remaining parent is retarded. Have you ever gotten those Publisher's Clearinghouse spam letters in your mailbox saying "YOU'VE WON 800 TRILLION DOLLARS!!!" but right below it says in small print "If you subscribe to 47 magazines and enter the sweepstakes and sell your first born child and suck Ed McMahons cock, you might be eligible. Yeah, my mom (maternal) has been receiving those and now thinks that she is a millionaire and her money will show up any day now. She calls me every day to tell me she won another 7 million dollars despite the fact shes been winning for 5 months now and hasn't seen a dime. My mom isn't very smart. Sometimes thats good though, like the time I had her thinking she must have spilled some Cool Whip somewhere because there was white fluffy stuff all over the floor, but in reality I had actually covered her Jack Russell terrier in shaving cream and then let it go or the three month period I had in school where I got an extra dollar for snacks at school everyday because I had her believe that I was sponsoring a starving African child on the Sally Strothers program.
----
The Democrats had their National debate this weekend. No one cared.
----
I'll finish this weeks article with a joke:
A slick, well groomed and sharp looking marine walks into a bathroom at a crowded airport wearing his dress uniform and sees a young boy staring at him. He walks up to the boy and says "Why hello son, how are you today?" The boy looks up at him and say "OHH WOW, are you a REAL Marine!?". The marine looks at him and says "Why yes son, I am, would you like to wear my hat?". The boy, excited as all hell agrees and starts marching back and forth in front of the mirror, saluting himself and the such when an old sailor strolls into the bathroom, uniform looking like shit, shoes that look like they were shined with a brick, about 4 days worth of beard growth and alcohol on the breath. The boy runs up to the sailor and says "OHH WOW, are you a real Sailor!?". The sailor looks at the boy and says, "Fuck yeah kid, you want to suck my dick?". The kid just looks back up at him and says, "Ohh no, I'm not a real marine, I'm just wearing his hat."
Last edited by Cougar (2007-06-04 04:04:47)
