sergeriver
Cowboy from Hell
+1,928|7235|Argentina
Why A Man Can't Win
Author: Unknown - Mailbox

If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you are a male chauvinist.
If you stay home and do the housework, you are a pansy.

If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.
If you don't work enough, you are a good for nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation.
If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your rear and find something better.

If you get a promotion ahead of her, that is favoritism.
If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment.
If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.

If you cry, you are a wimp.
If you don't, you are an insensitive bastard.

If you make a decision without consulting her, you are a chauvinist.
If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination.
If she asks you, it's a favor.

If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear, you are a pervert.
If you don't, you are a fag.

If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape, you are a sexist.
If you don't, you are unromantic.

If you try to keep yourself in shape, you are vain.
If you don't, you are a slob.

If you are proud of your achievements, you are up yourself.
If you don't, you are not ambitious.

If she has a headache, she is tired.
If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.

If you want it too often, you are oversexed.
If you don't, there must be someone else.
Mekstizzle
WALKER
+3,611|7098|London, England
You're damned if you do and damned if you don't.

If you text them and call them, they never pick up or reply.
If you don't, they ask why you never text or phone anymore.

I can't beleive how much of this is actually true and happening to me right now.
loubot
O' HAL naw!
+470|7056|Columbus, OH
Hate everyone and you are treat everyone equally.
theDude5B
Cool member
+805|7228
Posted on Temp forum, but very relative to this.

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it's a bad one.  Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. 

God works in mysterious ways. 

After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women drivers. 

The woman says, "So, you're a man.  That's interesting.  I'm a woman.  Wow, just look at our cars!  There's nothing left, but we're unhurt.  This must be a sign from God that we should be friends and live in peace for the rest of our days". 

Flattered, the man replies, "Oh yes, I agree completely, this must be a sign from God!  But you're still at fault...women shouldn't be allowed to drive."

The woman continues, "And look at this, here's another miracle.  My car is com pletely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break.  Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." 

She hands the bottle to the man.  The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.  The woman takes the bottle, puts the cap back on and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" 
The woman replies,  "No. I think I'll just wait for the police..." 

MORAL OF THE STORY:  Women are clever, evil bitches.  Don't mess with them!
S.Lythberg
Mastermind
+429|6924|Chicago, IL

loubot wrote:

Hate everyone and you are treating everyone equally.
RoosterCantrell
Goodbye :)
+399|6957|Somewhere else

theDude5B wrote:

Posted on Temp forum, but very relative to this.

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it's a bad one.  Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. 

God works in mysterious ways. 

After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women drivers. 

The woman says, "So, you're a man.  That's interesting.  I'm a woman.  Wow, just look at our cars!  There's nothing left, but we're unhurt.  This must be a sign from God that we should be friends and live in peace for the rest of our days". 

Flattered, the man replies, "Oh yes, I agree completely, this must be a sign from God!  But you're still at fault...women shouldn't be allowed to drive."

The woman continues, "And look at this, here's another miracle.  My car is com pletely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break.  Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." 

She hands the bottle to the man.  The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.  The woman takes the bottle, puts the cap back on and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" 
The woman replies,  "No. I think I'll just wait for the police..." 

MORAL OF THE STORY:  Women are clever, evil bitches.  Don't mess with them!
That's pretty accurate.  Guys are just dicks. We don't mean to be, we just don't consider what we do, and it comes off as being mean.  But when a woman is being mean, usually it's intentional and vicious.

My girlfriend and I debate -not fight- about this alot.
CoronadoSEAL
pics or it didn't happen
+207|6995|USA

theDude5B wrote:

Posted on Temp forum, but very relative to this.
is there a way for us non-mods to view temp forums? 
ps-nice story! haha
Funky_Finny
Banned
+456|6610|Carnoustie, Scotland
Gotta find the balance
aLeX
.?
+160|6809|:D

CoronadoSEAL wrote:

theDude5B wrote:

Posted on Temp forum, but very relative to this.
is there a way for us non-mods to view temp forums? 
ps-nice story! haha
http://bf2s.liquidat0r.com/index.php

Posting is now disabled, for good reason.
TrueMusou
Member
+36|6638|United States Of Hamerica
Blame the testosterone. I do, and I'm still relatively sane.
Mitch
16 more years
+877|7003|South Florida

theDude5B wrote:

Posted on Temp forum, but very relative to this.

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it's a bad one.  Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. 

God works in mysterious ways. 

After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women drivers. 

The woman says, "So, you're a man.  That's interesting.  I'm a woman.  Wow, just look at our cars!  There's nothing left, but we're unhurt.  This must be a sign from God that we should be friends and live in peace for the rest of our days". 

Flattered, the man replies, "Oh yes, I agree completely, this must be a sign from God!  But you're still at fault...women shouldn't be allowed to drive."

The woman continues, "And look at this, here's another miracle.  My car is com pletely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break.  Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." 

She hands the bottle to the man.  The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.  The woman takes the bottle, puts the cap back on and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" 
The woman replies,  "No. I think I'll just wait for the police..." 

MORAL OF THE STORY:  Women are clever, evil bitches.  Don't mess with them!
i wouldve just puked it back up.
15 more years! 15 more years!
FFLink
There is.
+1,380|7168|Devon, England

Mekstizzle wrote:

You're damned if you do and damned if you don't.

If you text them and call them, they never pick up or reply.
If you don't, they ask why you never text or phone anymore.

I can't beleive how much of this is actually true and happening to me right now.
YES!

SO TRUE!
SEREVENT
MASSIVE G STAR
+605|6585|Birmingham, UK
Also, possibly unrelated: You hit a girl... "You beat up a girl!"
Girl hits you... "Haha a girl beat you up.

I had to.

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