superfly_cox
soup fly mod
+717|7232

Rules for this Thread:
1) Must be real news, no urban legends
2) Post the Title of the Story in bold
3) Copy the article if its short
4) Link the article if its longer


Found these today:

Divorcing Man Saws House in Half
BERLIN, Germany (Reuters) -- A 43-year-old German decided to settle his imminent divorce by chainsawing a family home in two and making off with his half in a forklift truck.

Police in the eastern town of Sonneberg said on Friday the trained mason measured the single-story summer house -- which was some 8 meters (26 feet) long and 6 meters wide -- before chainsawing through the wooden roof and walls.

"The man said he was just taking his due," said a police spokesman. "But I don't think his wife was too pleased."

After finishing the job, the man picked up his half with the forklift truck and drove to his brother's house where he has since been staying.



Farmer catches a calf eating chickens
CALCUTTA, India (AP) -- When his chickens started disappearing a few weeks ago, a farmer in eastern India figured dogs or jackals were to blame -- until he discovered his calf making a meal of his poultry.

The farmer and his 1-year-old calf have since become local celebrities, with the carnivorous cow appearing on television in India's West Bengal state and hundreds of people flocking to see them in Chandipur, a village 145 miles southwest of Calcutta, the state capital.

The farmer got up early to catch the culprit "and to his disbelief found that it was his calf which came out from the cow shed and was eating the chickens alive," Debjyoti Chatterjee, a local resident who filmed the calf eating a chicken, said Thursday.

The local veterinarian was at a loss for an explanation.

"I've never read or heard about cows turning carnivorous," said Mihir Tripathy. "They eat grass and other vegetarian food but not fish or other non-vegetarian stuff."
..teddy..jimmy
Member
+1,393|7100
Fuck, im trying to find the story of the math teacher who got arrested at JFK for carrying math utensils.

EDIT: FOUND

Ingenious:

    At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.

    At a morning press conference, US Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math's instruction.

    “Al-gebra is a fearsome cult,” Gonzales said. “They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle'.”
    When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math's instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes.”

SOURCE

Last edited by ..teddy..jimmy (2007-03-09 03:33:01)

RavyGravy
Son.
+617|6856|NSW, Australia

..teddy..jimmy wrote:

Fuck, im trying to find the story of the math teacher who got arrested at JFK for carrying math utensils.

EDIT: FOUND

Ingenious:

    At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.

    At a morning press conference, US Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math's instruction.

    “Al-gebra is a fearsome cult,” Gonzales said. “They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle'.”
    When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math's instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes.”

SOURCE
maybe i can join al-gebra so they can teach me how to be real smart like at maths.
..teddy..jimmy
Member
+1,393|7100

<<<FTDM>>>Gen.Raven wrote:

..teddy..jimmy wrote:

Fuck, im trying to find the story of the math teacher who got arrested at JFK for carrying math utensils.

EDIT: FOUND

Ingenious:

    At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.

    At a morning press conference, US Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math's instruction.

    “Al-gebra is a fearsome cult,” Gonzales said. “They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle'.”
    When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math's instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes.”

SOURCE
maybe i can join al-gebra so they can teach me how to be real smart like at maths.
Yeah me too

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