If i had a nuke with a remote detonator, life would be great.
Sitting in my lounge in its safe, I'd know that I could face any challenges thrown my way. Anyone threatens me in my home or out and about I can whip out the detonator and say "If you try anything we'll both be blown to atomic dust, well providing I stay in the blast radius ha ha ha ha". I could protect myself and everyone I loved in the knowledge that nobody could be stupid enough to try anything. If the government started getting a bit oppressive, even demanding I gave up my rights to have a nuke, I'd have a nuke waiting for them if they tried anything. Yes, no more governmental oppression with that bad boy sitting at home. Invasions by Johnnie Foreigner? Not likely with the power of my nuke at hand.
Sitting in it's radiation absorbing protective safe, it's not harming anyone! It's not nukes that kill people, it's people who kill people. How can it be the nukes fault, look at it. Is it killing anyone? No!. See, nukes are just a tool. In fact I'm going to get several of them. They are exceedingly cool, I'll get different ones with different yields. It'll be fun! I've never committed a crime before, you can check that with the police. Clearly that means I'm the sort of person who will only use the nuke for the common good and will never do anything dangerous with it.
Everyone should have one. Just think how polite everyone would be if they knew everyone else had a nuke sitting at home. It would be the nicest, most crime free utopia imaginable! Nobody would do anything bad for fear of nuclear retaliation. We could form nuke clubs and spend our afternoons drinking beer and reducing small uninhabited atolls to lifeless black craters.
What could possibly go wrong?
Sitting in my lounge in its safe, I'd know that I could face any challenges thrown my way. Anyone threatens me in my home or out and about I can whip out the detonator and say "If you try anything we'll both be blown to atomic dust, well providing I stay in the blast radius ha ha ha ha". I could protect myself and everyone I loved in the knowledge that nobody could be stupid enough to try anything. If the government started getting a bit oppressive, even demanding I gave up my rights to have a nuke, I'd have a nuke waiting for them if they tried anything. Yes, no more governmental oppression with that bad boy sitting at home. Invasions by Johnnie Foreigner? Not likely with the power of my nuke at hand.
Sitting in it's radiation absorbing protective safe, it's not harming anyone! It's not nukes that kill people, it's people who kill people. How can it be the nukes fault, look at it. Is it killing anyone? No!. See, nukes are just a tool. In fact I'm going to get several of them. They are exceedingly cool, I'll get different ones with different yields. It'll be fun! I've never committed a crime before, you can check that with the police. Clearly that means I'm the sort of person who will only use the nuke for the common good and will never do anything dangerous with it.
Everyone should have one. Just think how polite everyone would be if they knew everyone else had a nuke sitting at home. It would be the nicest, most crime free utopia imaginable! Nobody would do anything bad for fear of nuclear retaliation. We could form nuke clubs and spend our afternoons drinking beer and reducing small uninhabited atolls to lifeless black craters.
What could possibly go wrong?
