Here's my ID bitch..

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Here's my ID bitch..

2008-01-16 13:14:10

..teddy..jimmy: Member; +1,393|7135

d4rkst4r wrote:
..teddy..jimmy wrote:
So today I thought I'd take advantage of the fact that I'd finished my exams and that I'm now, finally, 18. My plans for the day were to finish my biology exam, head over to the local store with a couple friends of mine and buy a couple beers to soothe my ruffled feathers. Here's what happened:

I get into the store with my friend-grab two beers out of the fridge and head to the counter.
My friend goes first, whoops out his ID proving that he's 18 and buys his beer. I go to the stupid bitch cashier woman and stick my two beers on the belt. First she looks at me and gives me the look like "you're not fucking 18" which at first I found funny because I could finally prove that I am.. Then she asks for my ID and I give it to her with the biggest fucking grin I've ever had on my face thinking "finally I can buy beer in this fucking country without fake ID". I give it to her, she looks at it and looks at me and again shows this stupid little smirk that is starting to piss the crap out of me. Then she says "If anyone asks, we'll just say your friend bought it for you"..and I'm thinking wtf is that supposed to mean? I'm 18, why would I have to tell anyone my friend bought me beer..So i tell her this and when I get pissed off I never speak Norwegian to a Norwegian..only English..I asked her "What the hell is that supposed to mean, I'm 18, it says right there on my credit card so quit being obnoxious and charge me for the two beers"..She then replies "you know, I'm not as stupid as you think I am, I know full well this is a fake ID!". This automatically triggered me into a pissed off rage because she spoiled the occasion. The first time I've ever bought a beer legally and some stupid bitch decides to act obnoxious. Funny thing is, I've never had any problems buying before even with a fake ID saying I'm 20 years old so this pissed me off even more.. So we got into a heated argument which consisted of me holding up the queue demanding her apology and insisting that I'm 18.. She in turn decides to be even more of a bitch and outline the dangers of underage drinking and eventually pinpoint that she has been fooled too many times with fake IDs.
Basically, the conflict ended with her actually selling me the beer and me leaving the store chucking my now useless fake ID at her...Morale of the story..Instead of fucking arguing about trivial shit like fake IDs and underage drinking, look at my fucking credit card, swipe the goods, do your fucking job and let me pay.
why the fuck would you use a credit card as id? it doesnt even have ur photo on it, wow.

that ladies, and gentlemen, is using the fucking brain

I hate people who comment on a thread but don't read some of the replies..read on douche

EDIT: I chuckled at your edit blackkoala

Last edited by ..teddy..jimmy (2008-01-16 13:16:00)

2008-01-16 13:14:45

adam1503: Member; +85|6874|Manchester, UK

d4rkst4r wrote:
why the fuck would you use a credit card as id? it doesnt even have ur photo on it, wow.

that ladies, and gentlemen, is using the fucking brain

you failed at reading the whole thread.

2008-01-16 13:20:09

Benzin: Member; +576|6484

Talk about anti-climactic. Sorry you got the shaft from the cashier.

Shit, I am 20 now and here in Austria I can buy whatever, whenever. Shit, I could when I first came here in 2005. But I go back home to the State for Christmas and I can't even get a beer at a restaurant. And when I turn 21 in March, nothing will be different since I will be here in Austria - legal (officially) since 18.

2008-01-16 13:20:39

Sydney: 2λчиэλ; +783|7329|Reykjavík, Iceland.

Lieutenant_Jensen wrote:
dayarath wrote:
I'm dutch. Danish

I can get beer since 16.

I don't drink.

Saves the trouble.

Norway sucks, dutchland Denmark Iceland rox

2008-01-16 13:22:33

max: Vela Incident; +1,652|7053|NYC / Hamburg

I've never had any problem buying alcohol at any age here

_{once upon a midnight dreary, while i pron surfed, weak and weary, over many a strange and spurious site of ' hot xxx galore'. While i clicked my fav'rite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning, and my heart was filled with mourning, mourning for my dear amour, " 'Tis not possible!", i muttered, " give me back my free hardcore!"..... quoth the server, 404.}

2008-01-16 13:23:07

geNius: ..!.,; +144|6928|SoCal

Wow. You're an angry elf.

https://srejects.com/genius/srejects.png

2008-01-16 13:24:59

..teddy..jimmy: Member; +1,393|7135

Thing is I can go anywhere else in Europe and I'll be mistaken for 19-20..Only in this fucking country are they so strict, beer sales close at 18:00 on weekends and 20:00 on weekdays..you can't even buy liquor at supermarkets, you have to trek all the way into town to a special store that sells it and it closes before I get out of school..fucking retarded.

2008-01-16 13:26:09

jord: Member; +2,382|7164|The North, beyond the wall.

..teddy..jimmy wrote:
Thing is I can go anywhere else in Europe and I'll be mistaken for 19-20..Only in this fucking country are they so strict, beer sales close at 18:00 on weekends and 20:00 on weekdays..you can't even buy liquor at supermarkets, you have to trek all the way into town to a special store that sells it and it closes before I get out of school..fucking retarded.

Internet it?

2008-01-16 13:26:24

David.P: Banned; +649|6759

Here's an Idea. Wait for her to get off her shift, Follow her home, Check to see if the coast is clear(I.E. noone else inside) Get in the house quietly, Wait till she's in a comfortable position and(Sitting, Laying down, And shit) Take a bottle(Beer would be most ironic) And break it over her head. While she is still in shock, Proceed to beat the hell out of her.

When satisfied, Grab a few objects of value, And exit the house quietly. Discard the objects somewhere far off where noone will look. Also wear gloves if possible and immediately burn them afterwards. If you succeed she wont be able to see your face and it will look like a robbery.

EDIT: Be sure to have an airtight alibi! Dont say you were home alone or drinking. If you can have one of your friends vouch for you or better yet, If you know of a store with CCTV cameras that is pretty far away from her house walk in buy stuff and walk out acting all casual. Now only do this once! Because if twice they will know you were on your way and coming back from her house. Also if you can try to make the beating within 3 minutes time or less. As police are trained to think within 10 minutes or less time when investigating you.

Last edited by David.P (2008-01-16 13:30:14)

2008-01-16 13:27:52

bennisboy: Member; +829|7132|Poundland

psh I haven't been ID'd for anything except gettin into one certain club since I was 17. (2 years ago) I even dont get id'd in 21s bars

2008-01-16 13:28:00

..teddy..jimmy: Member; +1,393|7135

David.P wrote:
Here's an Idea. Wait for her to get off her shift, Follow her home, Check to see if the coast is clear(I.E. noone else inside) Get in the house quietly, Wait till she's in a comfortable position and(Sitting, Laying down, And shit) Take a bottle(Beer would be most ironic) And break it over her head. While she is still in shock, Proceed to beat the hell out of her.

When satisfied, Grab a few objects of value, And exit the house quietly. Discard the objects somewhere far off where noone will look. Also wear gloves if possible and immediately burn them afterwards. If you succeed she wont be able to see your face and it will look like a robbery.

That and stick some laxative in her morning coffee..

2008-01-16 13:28:24

jord: Member; +2,382|7164|The North, beyond the wall.

David.P wrote:
Here's an Idea. Wait for her to get off her shift, Follow her home, Check to see if the coast is clear(I.E. noone else inside) Get in the house quietly, Wait till she's in a comfortable position and(Sitting, Laying down, And shit) Take a bottle(Beer would be most ironic) And break it over her head. While she is still in shock, Proceed to beat the hell out of her.

When satisfied, Grab a few objects of value, And exit the house quietly. Discard the objects somewhere far off where noone will look. Also wear gloves if possible and immediately burn them afterwards. If you succeed she wont be able to see your face and it will look like a robbery.

I did it once but he saw me. So I had to break the bottle on the wall and jab him with it...

2008-01-16 13:29:12

Benzin: Member; +576|6484

David.P wrote:
Here's an Idea. Wait for her to get off her shift, Follow her home, Check to see if the coast is clear(I.E. noone else inside) Get in the house quietly, Wait till she's in a comfortable position and(Sitting, Laying down, And shit) Take a bottle(Beer would be most ironic) And break it over her head. While she is still in shock, Proceed to beat the hell out of her.

When satisfied, Grab a few objects of value, And exit the house quietly. Discard the objects somewhere far off where noone will look. Also wear gloves if possible and immediately burn them afterwards. If you succeed she wont be able to see your face and it will look like a robbery.

that's fucking sick, dude

2008-01-16 13:30:28

HurricaИe: Banned; +877|6447|Washington DC

David.P wrote:
Here's an Idea. Wait for her to get off her shift, Follow her home, Check to see if the coast is clear(I.E. noone else inside) Get in the house quietly, Wait till she's in a comfortable position and(Sitting, Laying down, And shit) Take a bottle(Beer would be most ironic) And break it over her head. While she is still in shock, Proceed to beat the hell out of her.

When satisfied, Grab a few objects of value, And exit the house quietly. Discard the objects somewhere far off where noone will look. Also wear gloves if possible and immediately burn them afterwards. If you succeed she wont be able to see your face and it will look like a robbery.

EDIT: Be sure to have an airtight alibi! Dont say you were home alone or drinking. If you can have one of your friends vouch for you or better yet, If you know of a store with CCTV cameras that is pretty far away from her house walk in buy stuff and walk out acting all casual. Now only do this once! Because if twice they will know you were on your way and coming back from her house. Also if you can try to make the beating within 3 minutes time or less. As police are trained to think within 10 minutes or less time when investigating you.

Prepare for party van

2008-01-16 13:32:47

David.P: Banned; +649|6759

HurricaИe wrote:
Prepare for party van

You know I'm only kidding. This is the internet anyway, Nothing is to be taken seriously unless there is a date time and victim.

2008-01-16 13:35:56

..teddy..jimmy: Member; +1,393|7135

David.P wrote:
HurricaИe wrote:
Prepare for party van
You know I'm only kidding. This is the internet anyway, Nothing is to be taken seriously unless there is a date time and victim.

+ female/male sex cell samples..i.e. my cum in her face when I smack her in the face with my cock for being obnoxious.

2008-01-16 13:36:58

adam1503: Member; +85|6874|Manchester, UK

David.P wrote:
Nothing is to be taken seriously unless there is a date time and victim.

But if there is, prepare to get a visit from some men in uniforms...

2008-01-16 13:37:01

Mekstizzle: WALKER; +3,611|7107|London, England

David.P wrote:
Here's an Idea. Wait for her to get off her shift, Follow her home, Check to see if the coast is clear(I.E. noone else inside) Get in the house quietly, Wait till she's in a comfortable position and(Sitting, Laying down, And shit) Take a bottle(Beer would be most ironic) And break it over her head. While she is still in shock, Proceed to beat the hell out of her.

When satisfied, Grab a few objects of value, And exit the house quietly. Discard the objects somewhere far off where noone will look. Also wear gloves if possible and immediately burn them afterwards. If you succeed she wont be able to see your face and it will look like a robbery.

EDIT: Be sure to have an airtight alibi! Dont say you were home alone or drinking. If you can have one of your friends vouch for you or better yet, If you know of a store with CCTV cameras that is pretty far away from her house walk in buy stuff and walk out acting all casual. Now only do this once! Because if twice they will know you were on your way and coming back from her house. Also if you can try to make the beating within 3 minutes time or less. As police are trained to think within 10 minutes or less time when investigating you.

Why the fuck couldn't I stop laughing at this

2008-01-16 13:37:58

bennisboy: Member; +829|7132|Poundland

..teddy..jimmy wrote:
David.P wrote:
HurricaИe wrote:
Prepare for party van
You know I'm only kidding. This is the internet anyway, Nothing is to be taken seriously unless there is a date time and victim.
+ female/male sex cell samples..i.e. my cum in her face when I smack her in the face with my cock for being obnoxious.

Dude, I think you might need to practice being able to go for longer. ! dick slap n you cum? thats a poor effort. Like my spelling

2008-01-16 13:39:15

David.P: Banned; +649|6759

Mek-Izzle wrote:
David.P wrote:
Here's an Idea. Wait for her to get off her shift, Follow her home, Check to see if the coast is clear(I.E. noone else inside) Get in the house quietly, Wait till she's in a comfortable position and(Sitting, Laying down, And shit) Take a bottle(Beer would be most ironic) And break it over her head. While she is still in shock, Proceed to beat the hell out of her.

When satisfied, Grab a few objects of value, And exit the house quietly. Discard the objects somewhere far off where noone will look. Also wear gloves if possible and immediately burn them afterwards. If you succeed she wont be able to see your face and it will look like a robbery.

EDIT: Be sure to have an airtight alibi! Dont say you were home alone or drinking. If you can have one of your friends vouch for you or better yet, If you know of a store with CCTV cameras that is pretty far away from her house walk in buy stuff and walk out acting all casual. Now only do this once! Because if twice they will know you were on your way and coming back from her house. Also if you can try to make the beating within 3 minutes time or less. As police are trained to think within 10 minutes or less time when investigating you.
Why the fuck couldn't I stop laughing at this

Because it's a pro-tip.

2008-01-16 13:39:46

..teddy..jimmy: Member; +1,393|7135

bennisboy wrote:
..teddy..jimmy wrote:
David.P wrote:

You know I'm only kidding. This is the internet anyway, Nothing is to be taken seriously unless there is a date time and victim.
+ female/male sex cell samples..i.e. my cum in her face when I smack her in the face with my cock for being obnoxious.
Dude, I think you might need to practice being able to go for longer. ! dick slap n you cum? thats a poor effort. Like my spelling

If I detest someone I'll easily load up the pocket rocket and jizz in their eye.

2008-01-16 13:47:34

David.P: Banned; +649|6759

..teddy..jimmy wrote:
bennisboy wrote:
..teddy..jimmy wrote:

+ female/male sex cell samples..i.e. my cum in her face when I smack her in the face with my cock for being obnoxious.
Dude, I think you might need to practice being able to go for longer. ! dick slap n you cum? thats a poor effort. Like my spelling
If I detest someone I'll easily load up the pocket rocket and jizz in their eye.

Dont! Leave no trace of yourself being there! Better yet would be to get her drunk and fuck you while you record it. (If you're into that humiliation sex shit) Me i'd just hit it with a crowbar till it becomes nothing more than a bloody pulp.

2008-01-16 13:51:29

ig: This topic seems to have no actual posts; +1,199|7008

shit the first time i bought beer legally, i didnt get id'd.
i was pissed lol

Last edited by ig (2008-01-16 13:51:39)

2008-01-16 14:47:57

FatherTed: xD; +3,936|6986|so randum

Yeh when cigs used to be 16 restricted, i would go buy some booze, that worked fine. Put on the charm, find a young girl whos serving, voila.

Then i'd walk over to the cigs section, and get id'd.

THIS IS WITH A CRATE OF BEER UNDER MY ARM. FUCKING MORONS.

Small hourglass island
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella

2008-01-16 15:14:46

bennisboy: Member; +829|7132|Poundland

FatherTed wrote:
Yeh when cigs used to be 16 restricted, i would go buy some booze, that worked fine. Put on the charm, find a young girl whos serving, voila.

Then i'd walk over to the cigs section, and get id'd.

THIS IS WITH A CRATE OF BEER UNDER MY ARM. FUCKING MORONS.

Thats why you shouldnt smoke.

Man I forgot the changed the age restriction. Lol, when I was in Euston (londoon) the other week I see this fat little white wannagee who was about 12 smokin, I so wanted to give him a slap

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d4rkst4r wrote:

..teddy..jimmy wrote:

d4rkst4r wrote:

Lieutenant_Jensen wrote:

dayarath wrote:

..teddy..jimmy wrote:

David.P wrote:

David.P wrote:

David.P wrote:

David.P wrote:

HurricaИe wrote:

David.P wrote:

HurricaИe wrote:

David.P wrote:

David.P wrote:

..teddy..jimmy wrote:

David.P wrote:

HurricaИe wrote:

Mek-Izzle wrote:

David.P wrote:

bennisboy wrote:

..teddy..jimmy wrote:

David.P wrote:

..teddy..jimmy wrote:

bennisboy wrote:

..teddy..jimmy wrote:

FatherTed wrote:

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