Pages: 1

 

2008-04-29 04:32:50
Ninja_Kid2002
Member
+119|6739|Floodsville, TN, (UK really)
A dilema struck me this morning while making breakfast, the answer to which may well solve the riddle of the entire universe. And if you can help to solve it, we can say it was first discovered on BF2S.com.
The dilema arose because I have recently begun composting my vegetable waste and the bread I was toasting highlighted a possible conundrum.
Don't lose faith, read on...

You see, composting happens faster if more worms can eat through the compost...
Worms however are eaten by local birds...
and local birds also eat bread...

I need help deciding which of the following 3 postulates is likely to be most accurate and I'm quite sure that the greatest of life's questions will also be answered in doing so. It simply must:

Posulate A
Throwing the crusts of my bread onto my lawn will attract local birds,
The concentration of local birds will increase in my back garden,
The increase in birds will cause an increase in the number of worms eaten,
Less worms in my garden will result in slow decomposition of compostable materials,
I.e. Throwing out bread = Worse compost!

Postulate B
Throwing the crusts of my bread onto my lawn will attract local birds,
The local birds will eat the bread instead of eating the worms in the garden,
The concentration of worms will increase in my back garden,
An increase in worms will result in faster decompostion of compostable materials,
I.e. Throwing out bread = Better compost!

Postulate C
Regardless of whether or not I throw out bread, the Bird:Worm ratio will remain constant since nature always creates a balance with its environment,
I.e. Throwing out bread = No change in compost
I.e. Not throwing out bread = No change in compost

I submit my theories to you for critical review...


Yes, I am very, very bored!
2008-04-29 04:35:51
kptk92
u
+972|6880|tc_london
ya i hav 2 'gree
2008-04-29 04:44:49
1927
The oldest chav in the world
+2,423|7145|Cardiff, Capital of Wales
Well Einstein I'm not sure which theory I run with (kinda got bored during the first and only scanned a little bit of the last two sorry) but seeing as your bored try these things which I have in my younger days.

Plan 1.

You will need a blind Grandma, Worms and Bread.

Feed her a Spagetti Sandwich (Obviously made from worms)

or even better

Plan 2.

You will need, Bread, Baking Powder and birds (Preferably Seagulls).

Put the baking soda on the bread and chuck it on the grass, bird swoops down, eats bread, flies off his belly rumbles, wobbles and then his stomach explodes falling to the floor.

Yeah yeah I am a twat I know but seagulls around my way are everywhere and a fucking pain in the ass.
2008-04-29 04:46:26
Ninja_Kid2002
Member
+119|6739|Floodsville, TN, (UK really)

1927 wrote:

Well Einstein I'm not sure which theory I run with (kinda got bored during the first and only scanned a little bit of the last two sorry) but seeing as your bored try these things which I have in my younger days.

Plan 1.

You will need a blind Grandma, Worms and Bread.

Feed her a Spagetti Sandwich (Obviously made from worms)

or even better

Plan 2.

You will need, Bread, Baking Powder and birds (Preferably Seagulls).

Put the baking soda on the bread and chuck it on the grass, bird swoops down, eats bread, flies off his belly rumbles, wobbles and then his stomach explodes falling to the floor.

Yeah yeah I am a twat I know but seagulls around my way are everywhere and a fucking pain in the ass.
I'm sure you can compost seagull fragments...
2008-04-29 04:50:17
theDude5B
Cool member
+805|7222
Ok, so lets say that you go with Postulate B: You fill up the birds with your bread so they no longer eat the worms as they are either
1. Full up from the bread
2. distracted enought that they dont eat the worms

But either way, they will also be less likely to eat other insects such as Spiders, Ants, bugs, beetles. So you will end up with an over population of other insects which you may not want around.

ALSO, because there would be an increase in the worm population, then there would also be an increase in other worm eating animals such as Shrews, Moles, Frogs. This would then lead to a decrease in the worm population = Worse compost.
2008-04-29 04:50:53
I'm Jamesey
Do a Research Noob
+506|6604|Scotland!

1927 wrote:

Well Einstein I'm not sure which theory I run with (kinda got bored during the first and only scanned a little bit of the last two sorry) but seeing as your bored try these things which I have in my younger days.

Plan 2.

You will need, Bread, Baking Powder and birds (Preferably Seagulls).

Put the baking soda on the bread and chuck it on the grass, bird swoops down, eats bread, flies off his belly rumbles, wobbles and then his stomach explodes falling to the floor.

Yeah yeah I am a twat I know but seagulls around my way are everywhere and a fucking pain in the ass.
Your reaction to the "artist" who starved a dog to death

762290 Signatures Total

Totally disgusting and NOT art, criminal and deserves locking up, or ties to rope for a week with no food etc and eventually starved to death.
Killing birds for amusement is just as bad as letting a dog starve for art imo, take a leaf out of your own book.
2008-04-29 05:01:23
1927
The oldest chav in the world
+2,423|7145|Cardiff, Capital of Wales

I'm Jamesey wrote:

1927 wrote:

Well Einstein I'm not sure which theory I run with (kinda got bored during the first and only scanned a little bit of the last two sorry) but seeing as your bored try these things which I have in my younger days.

Plan 2.

You will need, Bread, Baking Powder and birds (Preferably Seagulls).

Put the baking soda on the bread and chuck it on the grass, bird swoops down, eats bread, flies off his belly rumbles, wobbles and then his stomach explodes falling to the floor.

Yeah yeah I am a twat I know but seagulls around my way are everywhere and a fucking pain in the ass.
Your reaction to the "artist" who starved a dog to death

762290 Signatures Total

Totally disgusting and NOT art, criminal and deserves locking up, or ties to rope for a week with no food etc and eventually starved to death.
Killing birds for amusement is just as bad as letting a dog starve for art imo, take a leaf out of your own book.
Im sorry but our council down here culls seagulls.  They spread disease they become over protective and are considered a pest.

I would happily take the life of a Seagull, Rat or any other pest (that includes the guy who called himself an artist by doing that to the dog).

I am an animal lover and teach this to my kids, the fish I catch are catch and release.  I donate to "The Dogs Trust" and "NSPCC".

I fully respect your opinion and hope you like the page from my book I have just shown to you.

I would never bring any harm to a bird of prey or even the common garden bird.  I have a Staffordshire Pitbull Terrier and a Leopard Gecko as a pet.  I have had many dogs and pets in my 32 (I think?) years on this planet but as of yet, never a Seagull.

I know a Seagull is a bird but any chance you could edit your post to say "Killing Seagulls rather than Killing Birds"?

Last edited by 1927 (2008-04-29 05:04:07)

2008-04-29 05:40:47
theDude5B
Cool member
+805|7222
I dont like Seagulls much. When I was younger and would walk to the bottom of my street, there was this one Seagull who had it in for me for some reason. I have never harmed anything in my life, yet this one Seagull would swoop down and attack me every single time. Got to the point were I was close to taking out my baseball bat and clobering the thing, but knew this was a bad thing to do so never did.
2008-04-29 05:50:54
1927
The oldest chav in the world
+2,423|7145|Cardiff, Capital of Wales

theDude5B wrote:

I dont like Seagulls much. When I was younger and would walk to the bottom of my street, there was this one Seagull who had it in for me for some reason. I have never harmed anything in my life, yet this one Seagull would swoop down and attack me every single time. Got to the point were I was close to taking out my baseball bat and clobering the thing, but knew this was a bad thing to do so never did.
If I'm right your on about "Dave the Gull" arn't you?  Notorious throughout the seabird community and has a proud collection of asbo's and banning orders.  You should of twatted him with your bat but it would of led to unrest with his featherd friends but like they say if you take the one out at the top the rest will crumble.  Or am I getting confused with Steven, mind you, he's not just a cook.

I have no problem with your normal bird just Seagulls, they are like the wasps of the bird world.  They even skwark early morning in the summer from 5am, sit on your cars and shit, open up your bin bags, swoop down at you, stare at you and you get the odd few that laugh at you.  That just takes the piss, perched high up on your chimney having a laugh at you.  Cocky bastards.

I have no problems with, Finches, Starlings, TITS, Robins, Crows, Magpies are evil killers so they can fuck off (lol remind you of anyone, except I'm not a theif) Pigeons, Doves or Penguins.  In fact I only have problems with Seagulls and Magpies.

Last edited by 1927 (2008-04-29 05:53:06)

2008-04-29 06:05:45
Ninja_Kid2002
Member
+119|6739|Floodsville, TN, (UK really)

1927 wrote:

theDude5B wrote:

I dont like Seagulls much. When I was younger and would walk to the bottom of my street, there was this one Seagull who had it in for me for some reason. I have never harmed anything in my life, yet this one Seagull would swoop down and attack me every single time. Got to the point were I was close to taking out my baseball bat and clobering the thing, but knew this was a bad thing to do so never did.
If I'm right your on about "Dave the Gull" arn't you?  Notorious throughout the seabird community and has a proud collection of asbo's and banning orders.  You should of twatted him with your bat but it would of led to unrest with his featherd friends but like they say if you take the one out at the top the rest will crumble.  Or am I getting confused with Steven, mind you, he's not just a cook.

I have no problem with your normal bird just Seagulls, they are like the wasps of the bird world.  They even skwark early morning in the summer from 5am, sit on your cars and shit, open up your bin bags, swoop down at you, stare at you and you get the odd few that laugh at you.  That just takes the piss, perched high up on your chimney having a laugh at you.  Cocky bastards.

I have no problems with, Finches, Starlings, TITS, Robins, Crows, Magpies are evil killers so they can fuck off (lol remind you of anyone, except I'm not a theif) Pigeons, Doves or Penguins.  In fact I only have problems with Seagulls and Magpies.
There you have it 1927's difinitive list of birds he likes/hates.

It's a well-known fact that magpies are actually not birds, they are in fact vegetables and as such can be considered the most evil of herbaceous plant parts.
Common magpies grow in the roots of walnut trees, but have been found in many Juglandaceae deciduous trees. The world's largest grower and exporter of naturally grown magpies is Canada, which produce 72% all evil vegetables and fruit.

It's all true, look it up.
2008-04-29 06:09:28
1927
The oldest chav in the world
+2,423|7145|Cardiff, Capital of Wales

Ninja_Kid2002 wrote:

1927 wrote:

theDude5B wrote:

I dont like Seagulls much. When I was younger and would walk to the bottom of my street, there was this one Seagull who had it in for me for some reason. I have never harmed anything in my life, yet this one Seagull would swoop down and attack me every single time. Got to the point were I was close to taking out my baseball bat and clobering the thing, but knew this was a bad thing to do so never did.
If I'm right your on about "Dave the Gull" arn't you?  Notorious throughout the seabird community and has a proud collection of asbo's and banning orders.  You should of twatted him with your bat but it would of led to unrest with his featherd friends but like they say if you take the one out at the top the rest will crumble.  Or am I getting confused with Steven, mind you, he's not just a cook.

I have no problem with your normal bird just Seagulls, they are like the wasps of the bird world.  They even skwark early morning in the summer from 5am, sit on your cars and shit, open up your bin bags, swoop down at you, stare at you and you get the odd few that laugh at you.  That just takes the piss, perched high up on your chimney having a laugh at you.  Cocky bastards.

I have no problems with, Finches, Starlings, TITS, Robins, Crows, Magpies are evil killers so they can fuck off (lol remind you of anyone, except I'm not a theif) Pigeons, Doves or Penguins.  In fact I only have problems with Seagulls and Magpies.
There you have it 1927's difinitive list of birds he likes/hates.

It's a well-known fact that magpies are actually not birds, they are in fact vegetables and as such can be considered the most evil of herbaceous plant parts.
Common magpies grow in the roots of walnut trees, but have been found in many Juglandaceae deciduous trees. The world's largest grower and exporter of naturally grown magpies is Canada, which produce 72% all evil vegetables and fruit.

It's all true, look it up.
I feel and am a twat for totally de-railing your thread and I do apolagise whole heartidly.  Everytime I post I seem to derail.  It isnt the defintive list btw just a small selection.

Can someone kindly post something to get this thread back on track now.
2008-04-29 07:20:10
LOG
dain bramaged
+51|6593|Punta Gorda,Florida
you could get a cat to eat the birds that eat the bread and worms or... feed the birds alaka seltzer and watch em fly upside down and explode. 
you learn the true meaning of life when you see houses and cars blow by like leaves on a windy day.
2008-04-29 07:52:43
liquidat0r
wtf.
+2,223|7099|UK

Ninja_Kid2002 wrote:

A dilema struck me this morning

...

I need help deciding which of the following 3 postulates is likely to be most accurate

...
Actually, that's a trilemma, not a dilemma.

 

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