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2008-05-02 16:46:50
FallenMorgan
Member
+53|6338|Glendale, CA
I wrote a blog about a subject, and an episode of Dr. Phil follows the same premise.  The question is why it seems socially acceptable for a relationship to have an older man and a younger woman, but it's not as socially acceptable when it's an older woman and a younger man.

One thing I didn't mention in my blog is the fact that the social idea seems to be that women need to be taken care of and whatnot, and older men, with stable jobs and whatnot, can provide that.  Personally I think it's crap.  My blog is in my sig, so take a look.

Opinions?

Last edited by FallenMorgan (2008-05-02 17:03:10)

2008-05-02 16:54:52
Major.League.Infidel
Make Love and War
+303|6902|Communist Republic of CA, USA

FallenMorgan wrote:

The question is why it seems socially acceptable for a relationship to have an older man and a younger woman, but it's not as socially acceptable when it's an older man and a younger woman.
Err what?
2008-05-02 17:02:51
FallenMorgan
Member
+53|6338|Glendale, CA
Sorry, sometimes I get confused and mistype.
2008-05-02 17:04:07
Commie Killer
Member
+192|6811
I think he meant its not ok to have relationship with a older man and a younger woman, but it is ok with a older woman and a younger man.




MILFs!!!!
2008-05-02 17:05:22
argo4
Stand and Deliver
+86|6357|United States
i don't have aproblem with older women
milfs ftw!
2008-05-02 17:16:36
Turquoise
O Canada
+1,596|6829|North Carolina
It probably goes back to the old days.  In the Middle Ages, it was typical for women to be married around 13, and those marriages were often to men in their 20s.

Nowadays, lifespans have increased, yet remnants of old traditions linger -- allowing for much older men to marry young women.

In addition to this, a lot of women are looking for a father figure.

The reverse is not as true because men typically have a fixation on the youthfulness of women.  We're more visually oriented than women (usually), so we go for the physical traits that are most commonly found with youth.  By contrast, women often seek out men for their money, dominance, and/or "wisdom".

It works for me...  I prefer younger women myself, although I'm usually told I look young for my age anyway.
2008-05-02 18:37:58
FallenMorgan
Member
+53|6338|Glendale, CA

Turquoise wrote:

It probably goes back to the old days.  In the Middle Ages, it was typical for women to be married around 13, and those marriages were often to men in their 20s.

Nowadays, lifespans have increased, yet remnants of old traditions linger -- allowing for much older men to marry young women.

In addition to this, a lot of women are looking for a father figure.

The reverse is not as true because men typically have a fixation on the youthfulness of women.  We're more visually oriented than women (usually), so we go for the physical traits that are most commonly found with youth.  By contrast, women often seek out men for their money, dominance, and/or "wisdom".

It works for me...  I prefer younger women myself, although I'm usually told I look young for my age anyway.
I dislike this little fact about society.  I'm personally not visually oriented, and I like mildly older women.  I don't like 40 year olds or anything - I like young women generally, but one female I like is sadly 27.  Other than that though, I have an attraction to two women who are my age.

The fact that many women seek out a relationship with older, more economically stable men, is a sign that society is fucking up.  I despise the idea of a girl's husband or boyfriend being a "father figure" type.  It comes from the ancient idea of a guy being a 'replacement' for the girl's father.
2008-05-02 18:53:58
Turquoise
O Canada
+1,596|6829|North Carolina

FallenMorgan wrote:

I dislike this little fact about society.  I'm personally not visually oriented, and I like mildly older women.  I don't like 40 year olds or anything - I like young women generally, but one female I like is sadly 27.  Other than that though, I have an attraction to two women who are my age.
If you don't mind my asking, have you hinted to her your interest?  Although, I'm guessing if 27 is an age issue, you're still in your teens, right?

FallenMorgan wrote:

The fact that many women seek out a relationship with older, more economically stable men, is a sign that society is fucking up.  I despise the idea of a girl's husband or boyfriend being a "father figure" type.  It comes from the ancient idea of a guy being a 'replacement' for the girl's father.
I wouldn't say society is fucking up, it's just that it's slow to change.  Women seem to have a bit of an identity crisis in this country.  They want equality, but they still play along with the old traditions.  You can't have it both ways, but it would seem women are trying to have it anyway.
2008-05-02 19:18:04
DrunkFace
Germans did 911
+427|7105|Disaster Free Zone

FallenMorgan wrote:

why it seems socially acceptable for a relationship to have an older man and a younger woman, but it's not as socially acceptable when it's an older woman and a younger man.
I don't agree with that statement. There is no 'social' stigma about an older women and younger guy, but there is a biological reason why it does not happen as often.

A women is attracted to someone who can look after them, is reliable and can support them and their baby. In general older men meat those requirements a lot more then younger men do. Men on the other hand are attracted to women with 'good genes' and who are the 'best' choice to mate with, which is physically represented by youthfulness, fit, large breasted and just generally attractive.
2008-05-02 19:40:15
FallenMorgan
Member
+53|6338|Glendale, CA

DrunkFace wrote:

FallenMorgan wrote:

why it seems socially acceptable for a relationship to have an older man and a younger woman, but it's not as socially acceptable when it's an older woman and a younger man.
I don't agree with that statement. There is no 'social' stigma about an older women and younger guy, but there is a biological reason why it does not happen as often.

A women is attracted to someone who can look after them, is reliable and can support them and their baby. In general older men meat those requirements a lot more then younger men do. Men on the other hand are attracted to women with 'good genes' and who are the 'best' choice to mate with, which is physically represented by youthfulness, fit, large breasted and just generally attractive.
Aaaaarrrrggggg

That doesn't mean it's a good perfectly OK thing.
2008-05-02 19:46:34
Turquoise
O Canada
+1,596|6829|North Carolina
I guess you have to take it all into perspective.  We treat women far better in America than most of the Islamic World does.  America, Canada, Europe, New Zealand, and Australia generally provide women more rights than the rest of the world does.  Japan, Taiwan, and Korea are also pretty progressive.

In the long run, as long as we set the bar for gender equality, I'd say we're doing ok.  I think we've mostly reached the point where women need to stand up for themselves, because it seems like a lot of the "oppression" women face in America is mostly a result of what they put each other through (like the pressures of the anorexic fashion industry).
2008-05-02 19:46:45
DrunkFace
Germans did 911
+427|7105|Disaster Free Zone

FallenMorgan wrote:

DrunkFace wrote:

FallenMorgan wrote:

why it seems socially acceptable for a relationship to have an older man and a younger woman, but it's not as socially acceptable when it's an older woman and a younger man.
I don't agree with that statement. There is no 'social' stigma about an older women and younger guy, but there is a biological reason why it does not happen as often.

A women is attracted to someone who can look after them, is reliable and can support them and their baby. In general older men meat those requirements a lot more then younger men do. Men on the other hand are attracted to women with 'good genes' and who are the 'best' choice to mate with, which is physically represented by youthfulness, fit, large breasted and just generally attractive.
Aaaaarrrrggggg

That doesn't mean it's a good perfectly OK thing.
Why not? As long as both are mature and consenting what does age difference mean?

Edit: forgot to add something. Men are also potentially fertile their entire lives while women lose the ability to have babies at some time in their life, which means to create off spring the males age theoretically doesn't matter while its much better to have a younger female.

Last edited by DrunkFace (2008-05-02 19:57:52)

2008-05-02 20:07:09
Turquoise
O Canada
+1,596|6829|North Carolina

DrunkFace wrote:

FallenMorgan wrote:

DrunkFace wrote:


I don't agree with that statement. There is no 'social' stigma about an older women and younger guy, but there is a biological reason why it does not happen as often.

A women is attracted to someone who can look after them, is reliable and can support them and their baby. In general older men meat those requirements a lot more then younger men do. Men on the other hand are attracted to women with 'good genes' and who are the 'best' choice to mate with, which is physically represented by youthfulness, fit, large breasted and just generally attractive.
Aaaaarrrrggggg

That doesn't mean it's a good perfectly OK thing.
Why not? As long as both are mature and consenting what does age difference mean?

Edit: forgot to add something. Men are also potentially fertile their entire lives while women lose the ability to have babies at some time in their life, which means to create off spring the males age theoretically doesn't matter while its much better to have a younger female.
That... and it contributes to the urgency women have for getting married.  Their maternal instincts manifest in a desire to find a suitable mate while they are still young.  Guys might have a paternal instinct, but the urgency isn't always there.
2008-05-02 20:09:50
Marinejuana
local
+415|7009|Seattle
stop watching dr. phil.
2008-05-02 20:38:20
SealXo
Member
+309|6960
milfs ftw
2008-05-02 20:43:24
LividBovine
The Year of the Cow!
+175|6804|MN

FallenMorgan wrote:

The fact that many women seek out a relationship with older, more economically stable men, is a sign that society is fucking up.  I despise the idea of a girl's husband or boyfriend being a "father figure" type.  It comes from the ancient idea of a guy being a 'replacement' for the girl's father.
I don't think it is a father figure thing as much as it is a stability thing.  Women like guys who are confident and accomplished.  Some younger males are confident for sure, but not many are accomplished.  (Most) Women want someone who is able to take care of them.  An older guy can provide many things a younger one cannot.  Fact of life.
"The President does not have power under the Constitution to unilaterally authorize a military attack in a situation that does not involve stopping an actual or imminent threat to the nation" - Barack Obama (a freshman senator from Illinios)
2008-05-02 22:02:38
FallenMorgan
Member
+53|6338|Glendale, CA

DrunkFace wrote:

FallenMorgan wrote:

DrunkFace wrote:


I don't agree with that statement. There is no 'social' stigma about an older women and younger guy, but there is a biological reason why it does not happen as often.

A women is attracted to someone who can look after them, is reliable and can support them and their baby. In general older men meat those requirements a lot more then younger men do. Men on the other hand are attracted to women with 'good genes' and who are the 'best' choice to mate with, which is physically represented by youthfulness, fit, large breasted and just generally attractive.
Aaaaarrrrggggg

That doesn't mean it's a good perfectly OK thing.
Why not? As long as both are mature and consenting what does age difference mean?

Edit: forgot to add something. Men are also potentially fertile their entire lives while women lose the ability to have babies at some time in their life, which means to create off spring the males age theoretically doesn't matter while its much better to have a younger female.
A nineteen year old girl is not always mature enough to realise it, if a 32 year old man is simply using her, for example.

I resent the reproduction arguement as a pro for older men/younger women relationships.  Doesn't it seem a little creepy if an 18 year old girl gets a boyfriend twice her age?  It's bullshitty because a younger girl doesn't need to be in a relationship with a nice, economically stable older man, unless the idea is imposed on them that they have to rush into a stable relationship.  The young adult phase of life should be about having fun and living, not being sexy for a much older guy.
2008-05-02 22:27:27
Scorpion0x17
can detect anyone's visible post count...
+691|7190|Cambridge (UK)

FallenMorgan wrote:

I resent the reproduction arguement as a pro for older men/younger women relationships.
You're fighting against biology mate, the females of our wonderful species are, statistically speaking, attracted to males older than themselves.
2008-05-02 23:08:26
FallenMorgan
Member
+53|6338|Glendale, CA

Scorpion0x17 wrote:

FallenMorgan wrote:

I resent the reproduction arguement as a pro for older men/younger women relationships.
You're fighting against biology mate, the females of our wonderful species are, statistically speaking, attracted to males older than themselves.
I know but quite frankly:

What the fuck are the younger guys going to do?

The position of people like me can be compared to communism, which started out with the lower class hating the upper class.  As with that, I despise how women seem to generically like older men.  It seems to be just perfectly okay with lots of people if a girl in her 20s dates a guy in his 40s.  My father is 15 years, or around that much, older than my mother.

Generally a relationship with an older man, like in his 40s, and a younger woman, much younger, like in her 20s, or at an age where the reasoning part of her brain is still under construction, is creepy.  The guy is usually more intelligent with life experience and the like, and it becomes too similar to a father/daughter type relationship - creepy.

Last edited by FallenMorgan (2008-05-02 23:10:11)

2008-05-02 23:08:55
LividBovine
The Year of the Cow!
+175|6804|MN

Scorpion0x17 wrote:

FallenMorgan wrote:

I resent the reproduction arguement as a pro for older men/younger women relationships.
You're fighting against biology mate, the females of our wonderful species are, statistically speaking, attracted to males older than themselves.
QFT

Morgan, you seem to believe that everything you find wrong with society has been caused by society telling us how to think, brainwashing, or simply someone is spreadin' em for the man.
"The President does not have power under the Constitution to unilaterally authorize a military attack in a situation that does not involve stopping an actual or imminent threat to the nation" - Barack Obama (a freshman senator from Illinios)
2008-05-02 23:10:14
LividBovine
The Year of the Cow!
+175|6804|MN

FallenMorgan wrote:

What the fuck are the younger guys going to do?
Get a job and make something of yourself.  Women like that.
"The President does not have power under the Constitution to unilaterally authorize a military attack in a situation that does not involve stopping an actual or imminent threat to the nation" - Barack Obama (a freshman senator from Illinios)
2008-05-03 01:51:28
Scorpion0x17
can detect anyone's visible post count...
+691|7190|Cambridge (UK)

LividBovine wrote:

FallenMorgan wrote:

What the fuck are the younger guys going to do?
Get a job and make something of yourself.  Women like that.
Yup, again, statistically, women also go for money.

That's how stuff like this happens.

So, if you ain't got age, or ol' fashion good looks, on your side, a big fat bank balance is the thing to go for.

Of course, older men also tend to be richer than their younger counter parts...

Last edited by Scorpion0x17 (2008-05-03 01:52:42)

2008-05-03 02:01:29
Reciprocity
Member
+721|7004|the dank(super) side of Oregon
thank god for cougars.
2008-05-03 02:41:36
Lai
Member
+186|6575

FallenMorgan wrote:

it seems socially acceptable for a relationship to have an older man and a younger woman, but it's not as socially acceptable when it's an older woman and a younger man
I find the other way around far more aceptable to be honest. A relation between an older guy and a younger woman is often based on the guy going for the woman simply because she is younger and/or easier to get; the younger women often has a certain naiveity the older guy takes advantage of. You'll rarely see this in a relation between a younger man and an older woman (the woman taken advantage of the younger guy); chances are fat it's 'genuine'.

Note that I'm not talking about say a 30 year old guy and a woman of 25, but rather in the region of a 25 year old guy and a 15-19 year old girl/woman. I tried to put up a schematic of 'allowed age difference' once, but it remains very arbitrary. The formula we devised is very very complicated and still not perfect. Note also that I use the word 'often' and not 'always'.

In any case I've seen too much of these sad cases (in both meanings of the word sad) and considering the respective older guys I'd say:

BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN

Last edited by Lai (2008-05-03 02:41:53)

2008-05-03 10:12:00
FallenMorgan
Member
+53|6338|Glendale, CA

Lai wrote:

FallenMorgan wrote:

it seems socially acceptable for a relationship to have an older man and a younger woman, but it's not as socially acceptable when it's an older woman and a younger man
I find the other way around far more aceptable to be honest. A relation between an older guy and a younger woman is often based on the guy going for the woman simply because she is younger and/or easier to get; the younger women often has a certain naiveity the older guy takes advantage of. You'll rarely see this in a relation between a younger man and an older woman (the woman taken advantage of the younger guy); chances are fat it's 'genuine'.

Note that I'm not talking about say a 30 year old guy and a woman of 25, but rather in the region of a 25 year old guy and a 15-19 year old girl/woman. I tried to put up a schematic of 'allowed age difference' once, but it remains very arbitrary. The formula we devised is very very complicated and still not perfect. Note also that I use the word 'often' and not 'always'.

In any case I've seen too much of these sad cases (in both meanings of the word sad) and considering the respective older guys I'd say:

BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN BURN
Agreed.  For example, I appoligize for going into this, but in that video, Paris Hilton was 19 while Rick Salomon was 32.  She was naive enough to fall for a big, ugly, hairy former drug dealer who wears a disgusting hat all the time.  He basically saw her as a meal ticket and a sex doll rather than a girlfriend.

It's very rare that an older woman takes "advantage" of a younger man, because it's harder to "use" them in the same way an older man might "use" a younger woman.

 

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