Ultrafunkula wrote:
1927 wrote:
Ultrafunkula wrote:
I feel plenty safer now for my nuts that we didn't stay for the night in Cardiff
We would of been fine providing you hadn't tried to lock me in the toilet after I have had a stinking shit like he did.
Wait what?
Id gone into the toilet for a dump and had about 3 days worth of cider in me so was in for a while, the other two are getting ready to go out, and want to go back in the toilet to put make up on or whatever. They kept nagging me but De Vinci, nor Michelangelo were never rushed so why should I be? Exactly.
As I open the door to step out my mate has tried to barracade me in with the sofa and a chair, the door opened inwards not outwards. I grabbed a towel, stepped over the sofa and whipped him on the ass. He then challenges me to 'smack him on the piece'. We had to leave shortly after and catch up with the other 11 lads and they had the drinks waiting for us, they couldn't believe what I showed them on my phone.
We call my mate Curry Face, Cuzzla, Creature. I wasn't there this occasion but about 10 of them have been on the piss and decide to go for a curry. One of them asked him to smell his curry as his smelt dodgy, as he places his face next to his food someone pushed his head in it, he brings his face back from the table to much laughter and has boiling hot curry running down his face. I reckon they could of blinded him.
Ive seen him win bottles of wine in a raffle, get on the chair and down it in one as we are on our way out for a night on the lash. This fella's my house mate, he's the one in the 'snow woman' pictures I posted some time back.
All tour virgins have to do initians on tour. This is usually naked shuttle runs at Falkands Cricket Club nr Newbury, we've done it 5 years on the trot almost now so the locals are used to it. We got one of our lads to do a 'Gallon Challenge on the head' this year aswell as his naked shuttle run.
Gallon Challenge - He had to down 9 pints during the day (inbetween a game of cricket).
Shuttle Run - 1st drink, vodka, 2nd, Gin, 3rd arf a pint of beer and so on, spaced out about 30 yeards each. You run to 1st drink, down it back to start, turn, run to 2nd drink, down it and repeat untill drinks are downed. We make them do it naked, this one lad did that ontop of his Gallon, then we play 'Edward Cider Hands' on the way home. You duct tape 2 litres of Strongbow to your hands so you cant do anything with them. They only way your hands are released is when your drink has gone.
Gallon Challenege, Shuttle Run, Cider Hands - He did it all in one day along with other drinks etc. We came back from tour and without thinking the next day he just downed his first drink, we had to try and crack his habit from the day before.
Penarth Cricket Club - Probably returning to Reading again this year, they love us.
