So you who've never heard of Woot! it's basically what the title of their homepage says. One day, one deal. They sell one different item, everyday. So today it's the "Chop and Grate" set and obviously it's not the "Slap Chop," and thus their homepage:
woot! wrote:
Hi, it’s Vince with- well, you know who I’m with. I’m in a great mood because I’ve been slapping my troubles away, and I’m hoping you guys aren’t the next one I need to slap.
Look, I know where you guys are coming from. You’re out here hustling a buck like the rest of us, you got nerve, you got ca-joanies, I appreciate that. Now you appreciate this: take that damn chopper down off your web page or I’ll use it to sprinkle your ca-joanies on my hot fudge sundae.
I mean, come on. You think you’re fooling anybody with this “Chop & Grate Set”? You stick the carrots or the onion or whatever the hell in the little circle, you slap it, it chops. You guys even throw in the little cheese grater. I mean, come on. Don’t crap on my rye toast and tell me it’s tuna fish, all right? Tell you this, I’m not just going to sit here while you guys undercut my prices. You think you’re real smart doubling everybody’s order and being all upfront about the shipping charges, huh? Don’t make me remind you what happened to the last guy who tried to sell a chopper like this. You seen him on TV lately, huh? One slap at a time, that’s all I’m saying.
Look, I’m not a bad guy. You wanna be friends, I’m all kisses. But you bite me and here come the slaps. I go nuts. And you’re not gonna love me nuts. So think long and hard about how quickly and finely and easily and violently this chopper reduces meat to shreds. You following me, camera guy?