BF2S Forums The BF2s girl-problems thread

Poseidon wrote:

Hurricane2k9 wrote:

Poseidon wrote:

When we started getting into arguments in late August, I had to worry every fucking time that just because I disagreed with her on something, she'd cut. It got to a point where she became my number one priority, and not myself.

This describes me to a T. I often spend so much time trying to keep her happy that I can't talk about my own problems. And when I do, she always seems to think that she's the cause of them, that she's a "bad girlfriend" and I "deserve better."

What did you do?

Stayed with her until she broke up with me like the tool I am. I am a tool when it comes to girls, I'm not gonna deny that.

My advice? End it now. You don't need this and neither did I, but I was too in love to realize it.

I'd agree with this. I mean, it seems harsh, but it doesn't seem like a productive relationship. The point of a relationship is to make you both happy, and this clearly doesn't do that.

Hurricane2k9 wrote:

Okay so we talked last night, and it got emotional. I was pretty close to breaking up actually, but decided against it... I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

Y'see, she says that she can get help for her problems and that things will go "back to normal" as it were. Plus once summer comes along we'll both be out of school and be able to see each other more often. But then after summer we both go back to school... then repeat... then she goes off to college.

I just don't know how long I'm willing to wait for her to get better.

Be done with it.

Better sooner than later. Clearly this relationship is not going to get better. Once she's at college it'll end within a week. I'll bet large sums of money on it.

I just really want this to work out. Like I said, the time when we're together (as in actually in each other's presence) is great. It's just she gets into these states usually later in the day.

What about giving it one more month?

Hurricane2k9 wrote:

then she goes off to college.

Hurricane2k9 wrote:

I just really want this to work out. Like I said, the time when we're together (as in actually in each other's presence) is great. It's just she gets into these states usually later in the day.

What about giving it one more month?

Well, I think we can say for sure that if you decide to work it out, it is not a matter of days, nor of weeks, nor even of months. You do NOT have a relationship problem, the girl has a personal emotional problems and working those out takes time, years rather than months I'd say. First of all it is very unlikely that she will become "stable" untill she is about 21 in any case. Secondly if her problems exceed in severity those of the average teenage girl, you'll very likely see traces of increased insecurity and such beyond that age. That does not mean you shan't see progress in the meantime and I am not trying to sketch a doom scenario here, but know what kind of figures you're looking at. If you're in it, you're in it for the long ride (well, maybe not as personally I would still consider one up to several years quite short, but that's another discussion).

You'll have to draw your own conclusions about what is best for your relationship. If you can't put up with it for a prolonged period of time, you might consider breaking it off. If you can, you might want to stick with her as her problems do not necesarily, and very likely do not, have anything to do with you or your relationship.

Lai wrote:

Poseidon wrote:

she said she loved him but i don't think so

And you're most likely right.

Three months is a pathetic length of commitment to a relationship in any case.

My best mate is currently in a relationship she initially didn't expect anything from at all. She has had several relationships before that didn't last very long but which she went into with much higher expectations. We have lengthy discussions about such matters and she once told me she found it funny, the way things turned out completely contrary to her expectations. I told her I found that funny, as I always thought her previous relationships "silly", while this one under less favourable conditions seemed to me more genuine from the start. Likewise she often sees things in my relationships, I only discover myself months or years later. Sometimes the outside observer is very much right

In your case there is something as a "minimum period of mourning" though. So don't go head it,.. take it slooooooooowly.

Well, I found out from her today that the reason they broke up was because they were fighting nonstop and he found out she started smoking weed. He told her that he "loved her less" because of finding this out.

Honestly, wtf.

You were never in love in the first place if you love someone less because of something they do that you disagree with. There's a girl I like now who smokes cigarettes, and I'm completely turned off by that. But that would never make me "love her less". Fuck sakes high school.

My good friend for about 8 years now who also happens to be her friend said to wait 2 weeks. We're gonna get really drunk at my house this weekend for her birthday on sunday, so who knows what'll happen.

Shall report back though!

ghettoperson wrote:

Poseidon, go down on her and then give her the shocker. Chicks love that shit (pun not intended).

It's worked for me before...

Finray wrote:

Me and Jenni broke up yesterday..

She wasn't putting out. The breakup is a good thing.

Poseidon wrote:

ghettoperson wrote:

Poseidon, go down on her and then give her the shocker. Chicks love that shit (pun not intended).

It's worked for me before...

Haha, I've still never worked up the courage to try the shocker, I'm scared she'll freak out and scream 'rape'.

change your hairstyle!!!

ghettoperson wrote:

Poseidon wrote:

ghettoperson wrote:

Poseidon, go down on her and then give her the shocker. Chicks love that shit (pun not intended).

It's worked for me before...

Haha, I've still never worked up the courage to try the shocker, I'm scared she'll freak out and scream 'rape'.

It works wonders.

Finray wrote:

JakAttaK wrote:

Gooners wrote:

change your hairstyle!!!

Ja this works too

I actually thought of getting my hair cut , and I got clothes on Sunday

You're pretty much there then. Just keeping yourself busy and not letting shit she does bother you