I think part of the problem is that you're not confident about it, so you're really overthinking things that don't really matter. Just get out there and talk to people, if you run out of stuff to say, say 'nice talking to you, I've gotta go see my friends' and walk off.
Woah, lets walk before we run there!JakAttaK wrote:
And I would say, if she maintains eye contact, it may be worth a kiss? Not if you've only just met her. But. Like. Yeh. No. I know what i meant.mtb0minime wrote:
As long as you maintain eye contact during the silence, instead of looking away or looking at your watch, etc., you should be ok.
Yeh I meant if you knew the girl. But thinking about it, if you got that far, you shouldn't really be having many awkward silences anyway.ghettoperson wrote:
Woah, lets walk before we run there!JakAttaK wrote:
And I would say, if she maintains eye contact, it may be worth a kiss? Not if you've only just met her. But. Like. Yeh. No. I know what i meant.mtb0minime wrote:
As long as you maintain eye contact during the silence, instead of looking away or looking at your watch, etc., you should be ok.
Nah,.. not necessarily true I'd say.JakAttaK wrote:
Yeh I meant if you knew the girl. But thinking about it, if you got that far, you shouldn't really be having many awkward silences anyway.ghettoperson wrote:
Woah, lets walk before we run there!JakAttaK wrote:
And I would say, if she maintains eye contact, it may be worth a kiss? Not if you've only just met her. But. Like. Yeh. No. I know what i meant.
Another positive aspect of being slightly intoxicated You don't overthink things.ghettoperson wrote:
I think part of the problem is that you're not confident about it, so you're really overthinking things that don't really matter. Just get out there and talk to people, if you run out of stuff to say, say 'nice talking to you, I've gotta go see my friends' and walk off.
As far as I'm aware, you need to be pretty gone to stop over thinking things. Maybe it's different because of whom I'm surrounded by.
Haha, I was mostly talking with regards to our buddy Nub, there. If you think you can get away with it, go for it. Ask her if you can if you're not sure, if she says yes, great, go for it! If she says maybe, same thing! If she says no, say something like she looked like she wanted to kiss you.JakAttaK wrote:
Yeh I meant if you knew the girl. But thinking about it, if you got that far, you shouldn't really be having many awkward silences anyway.ghettoperson wrote:
Woah, lets walk before we run there!JakAttaK wrote:
And I would say, if she maintains eye contact, it may be worth a kiss? Not if you've only just met her. But. Like. Yeh. No. I know what i meant.
Then do it anyway.....?ghettoperson wrote:
Haha, I was mostly talking with regards to our buddy Nub, there. If you think you can get away with it, go for it. Ask her if you can if you're not sure, if she says yes, great, go for it! If she says maybe, same thing! If she says no, say something like she looked like she wanted to kiss you.JakAttaK wrote:
Yeh I meant if you knew the girl. But thinking about it, if you got that far, you shouldn't really be having many awkward silences anyway.ghettoperson wrote:
Woah, lets walk before we run there!
Ok well, maybe you don't completely stop overthinking things, but you stop worrying about them. Or at least I do. Even when I'm pretty far gone, there's still a voice in my head saying this probably isn't a good idea. But even after just a few beers or shots, you start to relax and just go with the flow. It's important to just let go and let whatever happens happen.nukchebi0 wrote:
As far as I'm aware, you need to be pretty gone to stop over thinking things. Maybe it's different because of whom I'm surrounded by.
And the people you're surrounded by definitely have an impact. Practice talking to girls when you're around very good friends who know you the best. You'll feel comfortable and don't have to worry about screwing up big-time. Sure, you might screw up with the girl, but who cares, just one girl. Your friends will have your back. The odds are in your favor.
There's less to worry about when you're interacting with people you normally interact with, and everything comes natural. There's no thinking or trying, it just comes to you. So when you're in those situations, in the back of your mind pay attention to what you're doing and how you're acting. Take mental notes. Then use those same actions/techniques when around people you're not so familiar with. It's like learning and knowing you're strengths and weaknesses by going through a practice run, then using/avoiding (strengths/weaknesses) them when it's game time.
Okay. Should I break up with my girlfriend? I don't love her as much as I used to, I just don't. Yet she still feels the same way for me. I used to look at myself in the future and she'd be there, but not anymore. We've even had two emotional conversations (by phone) where we nearly broke up, but she convinced me to give her another chance.
I feel like I'm just hurting her if I drag things on. She's always showing her love for me be it by writing me letters or even small things like peppering her texts and IMs with hearts (which I used to do too, but not anymore). I do have fun when I'm with her, but honestly I've recently felt like I love her more as a good friend.
She's still in high school, and she still will be for two more years. I mean christ, I'll be entering the workforce when she's finishing her first year of college. I can't imagine being together that long, especially when it's likely it'll be long distance.
She keeps saying how things will be better during the summer when we can see each other more often, and yeah they might be, but then what? Back to another 9 month drag of just seeing her on weekends?
I feel like it's not fair for her to keep thinking I love her as much as I used to when I don't. I'm scared of breaking her heart, but I feel like I have no choice.
What say you?
I feel like I'm just hurting her if I drag things on. She's always showing her love for me be it by writing me letters or even small things like peppering her texts and IMs with hearts (which I used to do too, but not anymore). I do have fun when I'm with her, but honestly I've recently felt like I love her more as a good friend.
She's still in high school, and she still will be for two more years. I mean christ, I'll be entering the workforce when she's finishing her first year of college. I can't imagine being together that long, especially when it's likely it'll be long distance.
She keeps saying how things will be better during the summer when we can see each other more often, and yeah they might be, but then what? Back to another 9 month drag of just seeing her on weekends?
I feel like it's not fair for her to keep thinking I love her as much as I used to when I don't. I'm scared of breaking her heart, but I feel like I have no choice.
What say you?
You're dating a child. Date someone your own age.Hurricane2k9 wrote:
She's still in high school, and she still will be for two more years.
Marlo Stanfield wrote:
You're dating a child. Date someone your own age.Hurricane2k9 wrote:
She's still in high school, and she still will be for two more years.
Do it. You need to find someone your age who's more mature.Hurricane2k9 wrote:
Okay. Should I break up with my girlfriend? I don't love her as much as I used to, I just don't. Yet she still feels the same way for me. I used to look at myself in the future and she'd be there, but not anymore. We've even had two emotional conversations (by phone) where we nearly broke up, but she convinced me to give her another chance.
I feel like I'm just hurting her if I drag things on. She's always showing her love for me be it by writing me letters or even small things like peppering her texts and IMs with hearts (which I used to do too, but not anymore). I do have fun when I'm with her, but honestly I've recently felt like I love her more as a good friend.
She's still in high school, and she still will be for two more years. I mean christ, I'll be entering the workforce when she's finishing her first year of college. I can't imagine being together that long, especially when it's likely it'll be long distance.
She keeps saying how things will be better during the summer when we can see each other more often, and yeah they might be, but then what? Back to another 9 month drag of just seeing her on weekends?
I feel like it's not fair for her to keep thinking I love her as much as I used to when I don't. I'm scared of breaking her heart, but I feel like I have no choice.
What say you?
However - don't do it by phone. Have some integrity and do it face to face.
We're only two years apart
@Pos I know. But how should I do it? She wants to hang out this Friday. Should I tell her sure, not make any plans, then just show up at her house and do the deed?
And if anyone wants to weigh in on this matter who thinks I shouldn't break up, speak up please.
@Pos I know. But how should I do it? She wants to hang out this Friday. Should I tell her sure, not make any plans, then just show up at her house and do the deed?
And if anyone wants to weigh in on this matter who thinks I shouldn't break up, speak up please.
Last edited by Hurricane2k9 (2010-04-06 19:25:56)
until you hit like 21, 2 years is a lot of a difference.Hurricane2k9 wrote:
We're only two years apart
Small hourglass island
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella
It's a whole different mentality between a high school girl and a college girl.Hurricane2k9 wrote:
We're only two years apart
FFS your girlfriend still has a curfew and gets detention.
Still, the jump between college and high school is a big one.
I was dating a chick who was a senior in high school and I was going into my second year of college. Only two years' difference, but it wasn't pretty. At times it certainly felt like I was dating a child.
There's different mentalities going on, and they conflict quite a bit.
Just do it. Get rid of her.
E: Macbeth stole the words from me
I was dating a chick who was a senior in high school and I was going into my second year of college. Only two years' difference, but it wasn't pretty. At times it certainly felt like I was dating a child.
There's different mentalities going on, and they conflict quite a bit.
Just do it. Get rid of her.
E: Macbeth stole the words from me
Last edited by mtb0minime (2010-04-06 19:28:30)
Okay fine, but how about this:
Hurricane2k9 wrote:
But how should I do it? She wants to hang out this Friday. Should I tell her sure, not make any plans, then just show up at her house and do the deed?
yep
Remove her from facebook
xxx's status has changed from 'in a relationship' to 'it's complicated'Marlo Stanfield wrote:
Remove her from facebook
heartbreaking.
Small hourglass island
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella
Always raining and foggy
Use an umbrella
Be man and talk about it to her face-to-face. If she already made plans for this weekend, then just go with it and tell at the end of the date.
Okay then... I guess I'll have to do it and pull the trigger on Friday.
This is gonna be a shitty weekend
This is gonna be a shitty weekend
Shitty now, but worth it in the long run.
Oh and of course she's gonna be pissed at you and be a bitch, so don't come crying to us when that happens, just expect it.
Oh and of course she's gonna be pissed at you and be a bitch, so don't come crying to us when that happens, just expect it.
Last edited by mtb0minime (2010-04-06 19:46:36)
Lord, she already is. We had one of those talks tonight, and it was getting bad so she decided she wanted to go to bed. Okay, fine. She texts me saying she loves me etc. Now she just texted:mtb0minime wrote:
Shitty now, but worth it in the long run.
Oh and of course she's gonna be pissed at you and be a bitch, so don't come crying to us when that happens, just expect it.
"God dammit, now I can't sleep."
I say I'm sorry.
She says "Why do you treat me like this? What did I do to deserve this?!?"
Christ. SHE was the one who asked me how I really feel and if I'm becoming more distant. What does she want? Does she want me to lie and drag this out even more? Does she want me to just say "no, I don't feel as strongly as I used to" over the phone?
god
edit: She texted "I just wanted you to love me" how the hell can one respond to that? If I say "I do love you" then it's a bit of a lie and just a continuation of the illusion that I still feel the same way about her. If I say "I don't love you anymore/as much as I did" then it's basically breaking up by text which is a major fail.
Last edited by Hurricane2k9 (2010-04-06 20:06:39)