mtb0minime
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Flatulence is the expulsion through the rectum of a mixture of gases that are byproducts of the digestion process of mammals and other animals. The mixture of gases is known as flatus, (informally) fart, or simply gas, and is expelled from the rectum  in a process colloquially referred to as "passing gas" or "farting". Flatus is brought to the rectum by the same peristaltic  process which causes feces to descend from the large intestine. The noises commonly associated with flatulence are caused by the vibration  of the anal  sphincter, and occasionally by the closed buttocks.



Beans, beans, the musical fruit; the more you eat, the more you toot; the more you toot, the better you feel; so let's have beans in every meal!

In beans, endogenous gases seem to arise from complex oligosaccharide (carbohydrates) that are particularly resistant to digestion by mammals, but which are readily digestible by gut flora – microorganisms (methane-producing archaea; Methanobrevibacter smithii) that inhabit the digestive tract. These oligosaccharides pass through the upper intestine  largely unchanged, and when they reach the lower intestine, bacteria  feed on them, producing copious amounts of flatus.

In 1998, Chester "Buck" Weimer of Pueblo, Colorado received a patent for the first undergarment  that contained a replaceable charcoal filter. The undergarments are air-tight  and provide a pocketed escape hole in which a charcoal filter can be inserted. In 2001 Mr Weimer received the Ig Nobel Prize for Biology for his invention.

As a normal body function, the action of flatulence is an important signal of bowel activity, and hence is often documented by nursing staff following surgical or other treatment of patients. However, symptoms of excessive flatulence can indicate the presence of irritable bowel syndrome or some other organic disease. In particular, the sudden occurrence of excessive flatulence together with the onset of new symptoms provide reason for seeking further medical examination.

Flatulence is not poisonous; it is a natural component of various intestinal contents. However, discomfort may develop from the build-up of gas pressure if an attempt is made to refrain from releasing them. In theory, pathological distension of the bowel, leading to constipation, could result if a person holds in flatulence.

Not all flatus is released from the body via the anus. When the partial pressure of any gas component of the intestinal lumen is higher than its partial pressure in the blood, that component enters into the bloodstream of the intestinal wall by the process of diffusion. As the blood passes through the lungs, this gas can diffuse back out of the blood and be exhaled. If a person holds in flatus during daytime, it will often be released during sleep involuntarily when the body is relaxed. Some flatus can become trapped within the feces during its compaction and will exit the body, still contained within the fecal matter, during the process of defecation.

In many cultures, human flatulence in public is regarded as embarrassing but, depending on context, can also be considered humorous.


In 2008, a farting application for the iPhone raked in nearly $10,000 in one day.


Historical comment on the ability to fart at will is observed as early as St. Augustine's The City of God (5th century AD). Augustine mentions men who "have such command of their bowels, that they can break wind continuously at will, so as to produce the effect of singing." The fact that mankind in general has lost this ability he attributes to the first sin of Adam and Eve and its consequences with respect to body control.[23]  Intentional passing of gas and its use as entertainment for others appears to have been somewhat well-known in pre-modern Europe, according to mentions of it in medieval and later literature, including Rabelais.

Le Pétomane ("The Fartiste") was a famous French performer in the 19th century who, as well as many professional farters before him, did flatulence impressions and held shows. The performer Mr. Methane carries on Le Pétomane's tradition today. Also, a 2002 film Thunderpants revolves around a boy named Patrick Smash who has an ongoing flatulence problem since he was a newborn baby. He eventually learnt to overcome his problems and fulfilled his dreams including being an astronaut.

Speaking of farting at will, let me tell you an anecdote about a guy I knew in high school who could fart at will. During the high school exit exam (a stupid thing we had to take as sophomores and every senior should be able to pass it ) hundreds of students were packed into the gym, and since it was an exam, it was deadly silent. Because of our last names, I was fortunate enough to sit next to the guest of honor, notorious around the school for his ability. Halfway through, nearly everyone was finished (shows just how low the standards are set). The guy puts his hands on the table and bends his elbows, like he's doing a pushup or trying to push the table away. People at our table exchange glances. His arms start shaking and he's looking down with extreme concentration. A few whispers spread, the anticipation is building. Finally, the guy is prepared and glances around the gym with a smug look on his face. The loudness of the flatulence was emphasized by the complete silence of the room, which then immediately erupted in roaring laughter. Mission accomplished

Should you wish to know more, here are two links you might find interesting.
Flatulence Humor
Vaginal Flatulence (also known as QUEEFS)

*Note: This is confidential research and I am not permitted to share my sources. I will, however, put them in my signature or send them in a Personal Message (abbreviated as "PM", similar to how Bowel Movement is abbreviated as "BM") to the reigning moderator of the forum "breez" (I also hope this will prove to him that I am not a noob because I did an researches [about 5 to be specific]).

S3v3N
lolwut?
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ban
13urnzz
Banned
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no shit . . .
mtb0minime
minimember
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Oh was this the wrong section? Sorry I'll put it in Debate and Serious Talk
SEREMAKER
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oh shit
https://static.bf2s.com/files/user/17445/carhartt.jpg
S3v3N
lolwut?
+685|6925|Montucky

mtb0minime wrote:

Oh was this the wrong section? Sorry I'll put it in Debate and Serious Talk
thats better
11 Bravo
Banned
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and i get banned lel
-Sh1fty-
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ib4l

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And above your tomb, the stars will belong to us.
mtb0minime
minimember
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This can't get closed. I am not a noob because I did a research, I also added a personal touch so it's not enitrely copy/pasta, and though I did not post my source, here it is: wikipedia.org.

Ty
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Not good enough.

The joke's not old yet? Really?
[Blinking eyes thing]
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